And the knowledge not only made me angry, it also hurt. It brought back all those memories of the time after his mother died. He’d turned away from me then, and I’d felt utterly abandoned. I’d tried with all my might to be the friend he’d obviously needed. I’d even gone to that loft in the old stable and taken a few of his beloved books. I’d read one cover to cover even though it was far above my reading level. I’d had to go over some pages ten times before I understood the words. I’d thought I could engage him that way, pull him out of his emotional coma, bring him back to me. But he’d looked right through me as if I didn’t exist. He’d stared at me like that earlier today too. And it’d hurt. It made me bitter that he could still illicit that reaction in me, even now, when I had everything I’d ever wanted in life, and more. When he was so far beneath me, dammit.

And yet, here I was, about to entrust my safety to him. About to bring him into my inner circle. Once again, Tuck Mattice was going to be part of my everyday life.

I looked out at the deepening sunset, troubled and antsy. I had a feeling this was not going to work out well.

“That’s it. That’s the one,” Destanie said, grinning as she took in my face.

I brought my hand up as though whatever she was referring to might be hanging off my cheek. “Oh,” I said, my arm dropping as understanding dawned. “The signature look?”

Destanie laughed, rolling her eyes. “I called your name three times, and you didn’t hear me. Leon just called and said he’s on his way up.”

“Sorry,” I mumbled, attempting to straighten out my features. “I got lost in my own head. Tell Leon to meet me on the deck.”

“Will do,” Destanie called as I turned and headed for the small place I considered a respite. It was off the kitchen and had a fantastic view of the hills, even if they were currently brown and parched from the ongoing drought here in Southern California. I’d brought a couple of patio plants home from Trader Joe’s six months before, and they’d climbed up the privacy screen that separated this unit from the one next-door, creating a lush backdrop. I liked the opulent feel and clean lines of my apartment, but I supposed in some ways I was still a farm girl, because the untamed beauty of climbing vines and natural vistas brought me a sense of peace when nothing else did.

“Emily.”