“She’s dressing up for Ben Howard,” I reply, flicking on a blinker before I turn at the end of our street.

“Who’s Ben Howard?”

“Basketball player,” I mumble. Maggie and I also have similar taste in guys, it seems.

Maggie leans forward from the backseat and holds her phone screen out to show something to Sydney. “That’s him. Isn’t he cute?”

“Super cute,” Sydney agrees.

“Maggie! Seatbelt!”

My younger sister lets out a long-suffering sigh. “You’re no fun, Cassia.”

I know I’m not.

I’m bitter and jaded and set in my ways—at seventeen.

Sydney gives me a sympathetic look as I turn off the main road into the high school’s parking lot. Rain is falling faster now, in rapid rivers of water that stream down the windshield quicker than the wipers can keep up with. I flick the control to a higher speed before navigating into an open spot toward the middle of the lot.

Maggie is out of the car before I’ve even turned it off, a cursory goodbye tossed over one shoulder.

Sydney laughs at her hasty departure. “To be young and in love and eager to make pottery.”

I laugh too. But inside I’m wondering what that would be like—being bold enough to chase after who you want. To have the person you want to see be excited to see you back.

I search the parking lot as we hurry inside the school, even though I know I shouldn’t. Searching out Holden never ends well. He’s either surrounded by girls or talking with friends. Never paying any attention to me.

His truck isn’t in the lot, which means he went somewhere else before school. I tell myself not to care, but that tactic has never worked before. I focus on Sydney instead, listening to her describe the conversation she had with Graham last night in more detail. Watch her face beam with excitement and anticipation.

Like me, Sydney veers toward what’s expected. Our motivations are similar, which is probably part of why we’re such good friends. Her mom left when she was young and her dad works for a shipping company, logging hundreds of miles driving every week. Her father’s sister used to come and stay with Sydney and Holden when they were younger, but now they mostly stay home alone. Holden took on the role of the reckless sibling and so I think Sydney feels an obligation to be the responsible one.

My parents have five other kids to worry about, so I adopt a similar mentality. Plus, it’s been my dream to become a veterinarian for as long as I can remember. Doing well in school is necessary to pursue that path.

Spencer is next to my locker when I reach it, fiddling with his own combination a couple doors down.

“Morning, Cassia.”

“Hey, Spencer,” I reply.