For some reason, the nickname draws tears to my eyes. I blink rapidly to chase the emotion away. “I’m fine. Just fuck me.”

Holden laughs, but it’s humorless. “Just fuck you? Maybe you should just buy a damn sex toy, Cassia. Is that all you’re looking for? A way to get off?”

He moves, his arms lifting as he starts to shift away. I panic, wrapping my legs around his waist. His dick rubs right against my center, and the pleasure is overwhelming. Based on his expression, Holden is affected too.

“I want you, Holden,” I tell him. “But I’m…nervous. I’ve thought about this all day and it’s finally happening, and I just need it to happen so I can stop overthinking. You don’t need to ease me into it.” I swallow. “Just…just treat me like you would anyone else.”

“I can’t, Cassia. You’re not anyone else. You think I fuck other girls in my bed?”

I say nothing. Because yeah, that’s exactly what I thought.

Two firsts. Twice as many as I ever expected.

Holden sighs and drops his head so it rests in the crook of my neck. He’s still supporting his weight, and I run my hands up his arms, marveling at the tendons and the muscles which are all sharply defined.

And then I feel him. He eases into me slowly but purposefully. I gasp at the intrusion. It still feels foreign, but there’s no twinge of pain this time. I’m being stretched in a way that’s satisfying instead of overwhelming.

He lifts his head. “Better?”

I roll my eyes. “You dick.”

“Seems like you like my dick, flower.”

Holden pulls out and then thrusts back inside. I can’t contain the moan that slips out. Triumph flashes on his face. I tighten my inner muscles around his cock, and it quickly transforms into an expression of pleasure.

He grabs my knee and hooks it around his hip. I moan again as he slips deeper inside me, hitting a spot that sends sparks skittering across my skin.

It’s easier to find a rhythm this time, to meet each thrust and feel like I’m participating instead of just receiving. I clench around him every time he slides in fully, making him groan with each glide.

My world narrows down to Holden and the spot where we’re connected. It’s too much and not enough. I’m struggling to adjust and craving more.

Our mouths meet again. It’s filthy and desperate. I spread my legs wider, savoring each slow drag and strong thrust. Any anxiety is slipping away, the hot wash of pleasure consuming everything else. He fucks me harder and deeper. The build inside me explodes, my inner muscles contracting around the hard length filling me.

“Fuck.” Holden’s cock thickens and throbs, his eyebrows drawing together in an intense expression that borders on pain.