The uncertainty and anxiety that have always appeared every other time I’ve neared this step are absent. I’m apprehensive, but I want this. Badly. There are no stop signs, only green lights.

And it’s so, so close. Right in front of me.

Gray’s lips meet mine again, thoroughly distracting me with his talented tongue. I part my legs automatically, letting him settle between them. His fingers tighten on my thighs as his cock bobs against my center. I hiss. One hand moves to the wetness between my thighs. I thought the whiskey I’d imbibed before the last time he touched me there was the reason it felt so fantastic, but he takes the opportunity to prove me wrong. I’m stone-cold sober and hurtling toward nirvana. A mindless haze spreads.

“Fuck.” He groans the word with a gritty edge, feeling how wet I am. How much I want him. “You’re so responsive.”

I grind against his erection in response.

He kisses me—wet, sloppy, and filthy. His tongue traces down the side of my neck, licking and nipping the sensitive skin. I’ll have hickeys, and I don’t care. Gray pauses to tease my nipples into hard points, then trails down the center of my stomach. He hesitates at the curve of my hip, ghosting his lips along the ridge of the bone and down.

I moan, more turned on than I’ve ever been in my life. There’s no awkward fumbling or unsure movements, but the knowledge it’s Gray touching me is what amplifies everything he’s doing.

There’s something about a fantasy taking place that coats everything in a fog. It happened in that bar restroom. And it’s happening now, as the guy who’s starred in many a dirty dream slides his tongue between my thighs.

It feels so good. I come in minutes, and the rush of relief is so satisfying that I can’t find room for any embarrassment about how I’m grinding against him or panting his name or begging for more. I lie, sprawled on the sheets, like a towel that’s just been thoroughly wrung out, as Gray leans over to his bedside table and pulls out a foil square. I don’t move as I watch him grab his erection at the base and roll the condom on. The bliss still searing through my veins makes way for some apprehension.

“It might hurt,” Gray warns as he settles back between my legs.

I nod, nerves hitting me in full force as my heartbeat flutters. “I know.”