“I was proud and stupid and didn’t realize how much I needed him. Somehow I always thought I could get him back if I really wanted to.”

“And in all this time you never realized how much he meant to you?”

“Not until I found out he was getting married. What can I say? Hindsight’s a bitch!”

“A real bitch. I’m going to miss you tomorrow.”

I hug her from across our chaise lounge.

“Now get up, old you,” Kassandra says, hopping out of the chair. “I have wild plans for our last night in paradise.” She pulls me up and turns the dock station volume to only-college-kids-wouldn’t-think-this-is-too-loud. We get ready inside our room, dancing, singing, drinking, and laughing.

***

I arrive in London in the early evening the next day.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” I ask Amelia as the chill—compared to Mexico—air outside London City Airport hits us.

“Yeah. Will said he’s going to keep away from the house for at least two weeks, giving me enough time to pack.”

I suspect Will’s spending those two weeks in New York with Esther, but I don’t say anything.

“We’ll put the house on the market right away. How about you?”

“I’m going to have a quiet weekend before it’s back to life as usual on Monday.”

“You want to do something?”

“No, I need a couple of days by myself.”

“To mourn Jake?”

I nod.

“Well, the only way to go from here is up. For the both of us.” Amelia hugs me and hops into a taxi. I take the one after hers.

As I push the door of my apartment open and drop my bag to the floor, I feel like a failure. Naomi moved out while I was in Mexico, so the apartment’s completely empty. I stroll into her room and take in the mess she’s left behind; she didn’t bother to clean. Garbage and no-longer-wanted clothes are scattered everywhere on the floor. But I’m too depressed to get angry, and anyway, I’m so glad she’s out of the house that I don’t care about the amount of trash she’s left for me to clean.