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Back First Comes Love Save as PDF
Chapters (92)
  1. First
  2. Love Connection
  3. Zero
  4. One
  5. Two
  6. Three
  7. Four
  8. Five
  9. Six
  10. Seven
  11. Eight
  12. Nine
  13. Ten
  14. Eleven
  15. One Month Later
  16. Twelve
  17. Thirteen
  18. Fourteen
  19. Fifteen
  20. Six Months Later
  21. Sixteen
  22. Seventeen
  23. Eighteen
  24. Nineteen
  25. Twenty
  26. Twenty-one
  27. Twenty-two
  28. Twenty-three
  29. Twenty-four
  30. Six Months Later
  31. Twenty-five
  32. Twenty-six
  33. Twenty-seven
  34. Twenty-eight
  35. Twenty-nine
  36. Thirty
  37. Thirty-one
  38. Thirty-two
  39. Thirty-three
  40. I Have Never
  41. One
  42. Two
  43. Three
  44. Four
  45. Five
  46. Six
  47. Seven
  48. Eight
  49. Nine
  50. Ten
  51. Eleven
  52. Twelve
  53. Thirteen
  54. Fourteen
  55. Fifteen
  56. Sixteen
  57. Seventeen
  58. Eighteen
  59. Nineteen
  60. Twenty
  61. Twenty-one
  62. Twenty-two
  63. A Christmas Date
  64. One
  65. Two
  66. Three
  67. Four
  68. Five
  69. Six
  70. Seven
  71. Eight
  72. Nine
  73. Ten
  74. Eleven
  75. Twelve
  76. Thirteen
  77. Fourteen
  78. Fifteen
  79. Sixteen
  80. Seventeen
  81. Eighteen
  82. Nineteen
  83. Twenty
  84. Twenty-one
  85. Twenty-two
  86. Note from the Author
  87. Sneak Peek – To the Stars and Back
  88. Two
  89. Three
  90. Four
  91. Also by Camilla Isley
  92. About the Author

Oh my goodness! I can’t believe my dad just did that! Worse than when I was a teenager and he would signal my date that making out time was over by turning on the porch lights.

“Guess they bought the show.” Diego winks at me and affectionately pats my rear end before preceding me into the house.

So it was all just for show?

I can’t help but feel disappointed as I follow him inside.

But for the rest of the day, Diego keeps throwing me flirty stares, which I find myself willingly reciprocating. What’s happening to us? What’s happening to me?

I feel different. I don’t hate Christmas that much anymore. And I don’t miss work at all. And whenever I stare at Paul and Julia together, I no longer feel a stab through the heart.

Today has been so weird. Like, take this afternoon. Dad roped Diego into going with him to the store to get more firewood, and Mom and Julia went out grocery shopping because Mom’s pantry wasn’t equipped to meet all of my sister’s vegan needs. So Paul and I were left home alone for a couple of hours. We hadn’t been alone for that long in ages, and after only fifteen minutes of him talking about his job non-stop—as I said, he’s drifted into the most boring, corporate, figures-oriented branch of marketing ever invented—I found myself zoning out more often than not. Whereas, back when we were in college, I used to hang from his every word.

Could it be that after such a long time apart, I no longer know Paul? That the man I thought I loved no longer exists? I mean, what happened to the boy who used to stay up all night discussing politics and higher ideals with me when I didn’t have class in the morning and he did? Or to the guy who used to fall asleep in my bathtub on the weekends because he was too drunk to aim for the couch? Or the dude who forced me to crash strangers’ parties just because it was fun? The man standing before me earlier today just seemed so boring… Oh, did I just call Paul “boring?”

Really, what’s happening to me?

I can’t say, exactly. I just know that tonight I’m a lot more nervous about sharing a bed with Diego than I was yesterday.

Fifteen

The Night Before Christmas

In my room, I change into my cat PJs while Diego is in the bathroom and wait for him to come to bed already stashed under the sheets. And, I’m not sure why, but I even go as far as picking up Mr. Darcy from the comforter and relocating him to the armchair in the corner. Unhappy with the move, the cat curls up and stares at me in resentment.

“Sorry,” I whisper.