“That sounds good,” I said, a bit disappointed that there was no mention of activities we could do in private, and then reminded myself he’d already take a huge risk by coming up here with me tonight.

I pulled on the lapel of his jacket and brought him down for one last kiss. “I have plans to see an old friend of my mom’s today. She wants to go swimming at the Marquis. I’ve heard it’s quite the place.”

He nodded as he nuzzled my neck, making me want to jump him all over again. “It’s very nice. The food is overpriced, but it’s definitely a good place to spend the day relaxing.” He turned to unlock the door. “Tomorrow then. I’ll text you later to set a time.”

I nodded and tried my best not to sound too whiny. “I’ll see you then.”

For a minute, we just stood there looking at each other. I wondered if, like me, he was feeling like we were about the burst the bubble. That once he left we’d be in the morning-after weirdness—the doubt, the secrecy, and the bullshit which would surely follow what we’d started tonight.

Neither of us said anything though, and I stood there shivering as he slipped out of the room and down the stairs, barely making a sound.

When I got back in bed, I wrapped myself in the sheets and pressed the pillow he’d been sleeping on to my face. The ache of not having him next to me felt too big, and I was too tired to think about how I’d complicated things for myself again.

I couldn’t go back to sleep after Elias left, and was wide awake at six a.m. Thinking that with the time difference it would only be after ten in the Ithaca, I decided to Skype my mom. I sent her a message on chat asking if she was up. She said yes right away and I instantly felt guilty, knowing she’d been waiting on me to call for weeks.

I opened the Skype app, and within a few seconds her face appeared on the screen. She seemed tired, but she had a big smile on her face. She’d gotten a pixie cut last year, which made her look sort of elfish, and despite everything, seeing her was comforting.

“Hey Mamí. ¿En qué estás?” I asked, trying to distract her from what I was sure were bleary eyes and sex hair.

She frowned and reached to touch the screen. “Hola, mijo, I was worried about you. Other than a few emails and that two-minute call when you got there, I hadn’t heard from you. Are you in Addis?”