My mom sighs. “Beck, there will always be a part of me that wants to know. Because regardless of how she got pregnant and what that had to do with my husband, we’ve failed her. She went through pregnancy and labor all alone, and she lost her child. And that’s not fair. It’s not right. But she obviously doesn’t want to open up to anyone about that. She probably especially doesn’t want to open up to anyone in this family. And I can’t say I blame her. So we’re going to let her move on. We’re going to hope she comes to the funeral to say goodbye, and that she feels comfortable visiting the grave, once the headstone comes in, if that’s something that will help her. Then we’re going to let her put it behind her, just like we’re going to put it behind us. Because that’s really our only option now.”

“Okay.”

“Beckett. I’m serious. You have to let this go.”

“I know. I will.” But she clearly doesn’t believe me, and I can’t really blame her. “I’ll try. I promise.” And I guess that must be good enough, because she nods as she backs toward the door.

“Keep an eye on Landry.”

“I always do.”

After the catastrophe that was Lullaby Doe’s candlelight vigil, Sophia agreed with me that the funeral should include only a graveside service, to minimize the number of opportunities for any more protests. So instead of filing into a church, like we did for my dad, even though he didn’t go to church, for Lullaby Doe’s funeral, Landry and I meet Sophia and the rest of the Key Club behind Dunley’s Funeral Home.

The hearse is idling beneath the portico when we get there, and a line of cars has already formed behind it. I recognize several of the drivers as Key Club members, their cars full of other classmates dressed up in church clothes.

Today everyone’s wearing dresses or slacks, including Jake, who usually wears jeans to church. He heads my way as I pull into the line.

I roll down my window, letting a gust of cold air into the car. “I didn’t think your parents would let you come.”

He leans in with a somber smile, his arms folded in my open window. “I didn’t ask them. Can I ride with you?”

“Yeah. Get in.” He looks really good in slacks and a green button-down. Broad shoulders. Strong jawline. I know that’s not what I should be thinking about right now, but it’s true.