My mother’s sob of relief echoes in my head on my walk back through the living room and into the hall. It follows me all the way into my room and under the covers.

But I already know, as I turn out my lamp, even though there’s zero chance of me getting any more sleep tonight, that this isn’t going to end like it did when I suspected Amira of being the mother. There won’t be cookies and hot chocolate, and relief that also feels a little bit like resentment. Like a lack of trust.

Because proving to my mom that Lullaby Doe wasn’t my baby won’t solve my mother’s problems. It will just expose another secret that could tear this family apart.

Chapter Seventeen

SEVENTEEN

The table is cold. The instruments are even colder.

My mom agreed to wait in the lobby, but even without her here, this is the most humiliating moment of my life.

“Almost done,” Dr. Baker says. “You might feel a little bit of a pinch.”

I lay my forearm over my eyes and hum the theme song from How the Grinch Stole Christmas, until finally the doctor pushes her stool back.

“You can get dressed now. There are some tissues on the counter if you need them. When you’re ready, just open the door.”

I don’t thank her. I’m not trying to be rude. I’m just not feeling very thankful.

I use the tissues, then I pull on my clothes and leave the hospital-style gown on the bed. Right at the end, between the stirrups. Then I open the door and sit in one of the two chairs against the wall.

My mother follows Dr. Baker into the exam room and closes the door, even though there’s no one else in the office yet. Not even a nurse or a receptionist.

“Beckett, do I have your permission to share your medical information with your mother?”

I shrug. “That’s what we’re here for.” And I’m a little surprised that she asked. I’m not sure whether she’s being polite or she’s legally obligated.

“Well, everything looks fine,” Dr. Baker says as she sinks onto her rolling stool. My mother just stands there in the middle of the room, looking like she’s about to be shot. “Normally, we would have the results of the pap smear in a couple of days, but with the holiday coming up, it may be a week. But I don’t anticipate any problems there.” The doctor sets my chart down and looks up at my mother. “Beckett has not recently given birth, and I see no sign that she’s ever been pregnant. However, considering that she is sexually active—”

I hold my head high.

“—I’m going to recommend that we start her on—”

“Yes. Call in a prescription. I’ll pick it up this afternoon.”