She had found that connection with Messiah. He had felt her, despite the silence that existed between them. He had found the rhythm of her heartbeat and she thought it meant something. Nobody will ever want me like this, she thought. She didn’t know whom she was angrier with - Nish or Messiah. Seeing them together burned like betrayal. Nish was her best friend. They hadn’t spoken since she had been raped at the motel. Morgan had kept her distance, feeling like Nish had left her there, vulnerable and afraid. Now, this. Morgan had wanted to give her friend the benefit of the doubt, but she was lacking benefit and full on doubt. Morgan wanted to blame Nish’s actions that night on the drugs and alcohol. Perhaps, Nish had been just as afraid and had been too intimidated to stop Lucas and his friend. That’s what Morgan had tried to tell herself; but in the back of her mind, she knew. Nish was a jealous bitch. Seeing her in pictures with Messiah confirmed it. Nish was shady, and Morgan was finally seeing the light. No, Messiah wasn’t Morgan’s man, but based on principle alone, Nish should have steered clear of him. Morgan reached for the medical paperwork on her nightstand, as she scoured over the details. They had been sitting there, collecting dust, because Morgan was afraid. Afraid to be like everyone else, afraid it would hurt, afraid to get her hopes up only to have the procedure fail. Morgan had been deaf all her life. She didn’t know how the world would be once she could hear, but after losing Messiah, she no longer wanted to be who she was. Experimental or not, Morgan was ready to take the risk. She wanted to tell herself that her decision had nothing to do with Messiah. He was just a guy, and she was smarter than to make such a drastic choice based on the likes of someone else. Right? Wrong. Morgan was doing, exactly, that. She just wanted to be someone Messiah could love, someone less complicated, less unique, less handicapped. Morgan craved regularity, despite that she was anything but.

Morgan pressed the heart underneath Nish’s photograph, letting it be known that she had seen it. Like clockwork, Nish’s name appeared on her screen. You couldn’t be bothered to reach out after you left me at the hotel, but you’re texting now, Morgan thought. A guilty conscience would reveal itself in time.

Bestie:

Hey, boo! I have so much to catch you up on. My bad about being M.I.A Shit’s been crazy.

Morgan rolled her eyes, as her fingers went to work at a rapid response.

Morgan:

Yeah? I see you’ve been busy. You and Messiah?

*side eye*

There was a long pause, as Morgan waited for Nish’s response. The text bubbles on her iPhone screen kept appearing and disappearing, as Morgan smirked.