BooksBarbecue
Back Driving in the Dark Save as PDF
Chapters (27)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. One
  4. Two
  5. Three
  6. Four
  7. Five
  8. Six
  9. Seven
  10. Eight
  11. Nine
  12. Ten
  13. Eleven
  14. Twelve
  15. Thirteen
  16. Fourteen
  17. Fifteen
  18. Sixteen
  19. Seventeen
  20. Eighteen
  21. Nineteen
  22. Twenty
  23. Twenty-one
  24. Twenty-two
  25. Twenty-three
  26. Twenty-four
  27. About the Author

‘Stupid.’ She took back the bottle, wiped its lip, with unflattering thoroughness, and drank. ‘Dense, Unaware.’

We sat for a moment in silence. Behind us, the light from the kitchen cast our two, humped shadows on to the concrete. Over the fence, sparks flew and children shouted.

‘You weren’t really looking for your son,’ she said.

‘I was!’

She shook her head.

‘What do you mean?’ I cried. ‘Of course I was!’

She shook her head. ‘You were looking for something you’d lost, but it wasn’t Edward.’

I paused. ‘What was it then?’ I asked irritably.

She poked me with her stubby finger. ‘Something in there.’

In places, the fence was broken. Through the gaps I could see flames. A rocket zipped up into the sky and there was an aaah, like exhaled breath. Like a wave, spilling from the sea and then sighing as it is pulled back again.

For a moment I didn’t reply. Then I said. ‘Whatever it is, I’m here now.’

We sat there for a while. My body ached. I hadn’t had much sleep; on the other hand, I seemed to have slept for months.

Edward was laughing. I could hear him behind me, through the window. All of a sudden my throat swelled up.

Then we heard footsteps and Edward stood in front of us.

‘Come on,’ he said to me. ‘I thought we were making a bonfire.’

He pulled me to my feet; his hand was dry and ruthless.

‘Ouch!’ I said. I was going to say: my back hurts. But then I thought: bugger my back.

‘Come on,’ he said, pulling me across the concrete. We stepped onto the soggy lawn.

I gripped his hand; with my other hand I furtively wiped my nose. Thank goodness it was dark and nobody could see. He’d think I was such a sissy.

Sniffing, I walked with him across the grass.

‘Afterwards,’ he said, ‘I’ll show you my room.’

Twenty-four

Twenty-four

I gave Edward his first driving lesson today. I must say, he’s a better pupil than his mother ever was. We crawled over the sand dunes in one of my Metros; he waved hand signals at the passing gulls. He’s got this pink stuff he dabs on his pimples; when we stopped he looked at himself in the driving mirror and asked me if his spots showed. ‘No,’ I lied.

Should I have told him the truth? Lesley’s told him so much. He knows everything about the holes in the ozone layer and the faithlessness of fathers; I feel I must protect him somewhere. His growing-up breaks my heart; he fills me with joy. Perhaps that’s because I’m new to it.