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Back Dead of Winter Save as PDF
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Next thing you know, I’m driving off the dealership lot, and I’m on my phone through the SUV’s Bluetooth with my lawyer, David G. Baker.

“What do I know about Danny Romero?” G said, his voice filling the expansive cabin of the Yukon. “I know he’s a slimeball who cheats his clients and lives way beyond his means. He’s mostly estate settlements, Social Security disability and big-money divorce settlements. He settled an old lady’s estate last year; the old lady’s son and daughter got half a mil between them. He walked away with two point three mil in every kind of fee and hourly rate adjustment you can think of. The old lady’s kids are in their second year of contesting his fees, but my guess is he’s burned through most of the money. I’ve come up against Danny a couple times. And I always feel like I need a hot shower in holy water to get his stink off me.”

“So, Shakespeare was right about lawyers?”

“Except for me, wiseass. Why you askin’ about Danny Romero?” G said.

“Knew him in middle and high school,” I said. “He was a self-inflated, skinny prick then, and he’s a professional skinny-ass prick now. I have the feeling he’s just stepped into shit that’s bigger than him and dead granny’s money. I just wanted to know how far up his bunghole I should plant my foot.”

“My suggestion?” G said. “Get a pair of waders.”

I disconnected just in time to see Tatina craning her neck, looking back in wistful amazement at the rear passenger seats and storage space of the Yukon.

“There are villages in Norway smaller than this,” she said. Turning her gaze to me, she continued, “When I said you needed something for winter driving, I meant something sensible like a Subaru or a Volvo. Not—not this monstrosity!”

“Yeah, well, this is America, baby,” I said. “And you know what we say in America—”

“Ja, ja, ja,” she said in a mocking tone. “Gå stort eller gå hjem!”

Go big or go home.

13

13

Tatina, whose family included her mother, two uncles, an aunt, a niece and a young twin brother and sister all living under the roof of a modest rented Oslo house, was used to efficiently and deftly organizing activities, schedules, holidays and dinners. Tatina was the well-tuned turbocharged engine that kept her family running smoothly. No small feat, and she had kept it all up while she was earning her doctorate in cultural anthropology and now teaching at the University of Oslo.