‘It’s you,’ he said. ‘You remind me of her, of how she used to be. The black hair, and fair complexion. And the way you …

‘What I’m saying,’ he went on, ‘is that our Deirdre was confident, like you are, she used to be. At one stage, I had it in mind that she might go for law as a career. I thought we’d be going to her graduation up in the college one day. But there was nothing like that. Not that we put any pressure on her about school, or anything. There was never any need. We were only delighted to have her, and whatever she wanted to do was fine with us. She was a good girl, a great girl. All we wanted was that she’d be happy, you know. She worked in Marco’s, the chipper down the road from us, on and off. That’s when she was able to work.’

His voice was weaker now, but he kept talking.

‘A lot of the time she was in her room or going into the hospital for treatment, psychiatric treatment. When I think of what she must have suffered … Until she was fifteen, she was sailing through life. A grades – six of them – in her Junior Cert, no bother to her. She loved art and English especially, and music, of course. She loved life – and she had such promise. Was in the school plays – always the best – and in the musical society. I know I’m biased, like, but everyone said it. She was tall for her age, beautiful, and she had a great voice. She got the part of Liesl in The Sound of Music, at the Everyman Theatre, even though she was a bit young for it at the time. Look, here’s a photo of her in it. You can keep it. The reviewer from the Examiner said she was “one to watch”. But it was films she was really interested in.’

I took the photo, and placed it between the pages of my notebook. I didn’t want to look. Couldn’t. Not yet.

‘She was like an angel from heaven,’ Sean said.

He smiled. He looked like he was out of practice.

‘We’re ordinary people, us. I’m a lorry driver – was – and my wife used to work as a shop assistant in Roches Stores before we got married. But Deirdre was special – extra special because she was our only child. Deirdre was our first and last, the way it went. But she was enough, more than enough.’

‘Then, she turned fifteen, was in Transition Year and doing that film project. I can see it now. That’s where it all went wrong. And that’s why she’s dead today. I blame myself for not seeing the danger.’

I blame myself for not seeing the danger. I blame myself.