“My first memory was the inside of a dryer. Not sure where the hell it was because we didn’t have a dryer. The cops were coming and my mom wanted to slow them down while she escaped. I was crying, and she stuffed me in the dryer and bolted out the back door. It was one of those little porthole ones, so I could see the whole thing. I was in there for a bit, probably not that long, but it felt like forever. I was so scared that I’d die in there. Not sure how old I was, but I knew cops and Mom were problems together.

“Then this cop comes in and I’m banging on the glass and crying. He opened the door, and he was like, ‘Shit, our perps are so stupid. Instead of money laundering, they’re sticking kids in dryers.’ And the cop and his buddies laughed and laughed.”

“That was your first memory? Ever?” I had turned over in bed to face him.

“Yeah. It worked. Mom got away. Didn’t come to get me from the emergency foster home for a few months.”

“That’s heartbreaking.” I had touched his face, running my fingers on one of his tattoos.

He shrugged. Shrugged away the pain of it. Shrugged away the horror. “Hate closed spaces. Shit, my worst fear is that someone will bury me in a coffin. There’s not even a window in those.” He had covered my hand and his eyes let me in, just a little.

“If I’m still alive, I’ll make sure you’re outside, where there’s nothing to close you in.” It was a toss-away promise, though I meant it.

I had no idea I’d be carrying out that exact thing a year later.

“I bet this bag sucks. This box sucks. But I had no other way to get you to France. I want you to be here, peaceful, unbothered.” It took me two times to get up the guts to open the lid. When I did, I had to reach in and pull out the bag. The contents were more than I thought and somehow less as well.

Even though it was early in the morning, I went inside and grabbed whiskey. Instead of a fancy glass, I drank from the bottle. I hated whiskey, but Endgame loved it.

After I had a serious burn in my throat and a buzz in my head, I kicked off my shoes. I was wearing sweatpants and a t -shirt.

I stepped on stones until I was in the center of the creek. “Torin Rulle, I wish for you peace and I thank you for your life. I know you did the right thing, even though you knew it would end up like this. I loved you. I love you. And I believe the best part of our energies will blend again someday.”