“Endgame said this: ‘Tell him I ain’t never loved anyone, but right now? All I can see is his face.’” I squeezed Austin’s fingers, knowing that that information was going to haunt him and maybe change the course of his life. I prayed telling him was the right move. That Torin’s final impulse was not to hurt Austin, but let him fly.

Austin swallowed hard and looked at our hands. “Yeah. You’re one hell of a human Taylor Fancy Boland. Thank you.”

I raised his fingers to my lips, and kissed them goodbye.

Watching him leave was horrible. I added it to the things that I'd continue to see in my nightmares.

29

AUSTIN

Taylor was exceptional. She broke up with me when she read the scene. Then she told me she loved me and I believed it. How doing the right thing could feel so wrong was a mystery to me. Just like doing wrong things with Endgame could feel so right.

I had packed my bags already. Had everything stowed away. My apartment was empty now, a huge batch of it in storage. Being able to pick up and leave—all my business could be fit in a bag and relocated was a blessing. But it didn’t feel like it now. My parents, siblings, and Pixie Rae were all there to see me off. We met just outside the airport at a restaurant to have a final meal.

I sat next to my mother who held my hand. “You look like you haven’t been eating. Have you been eating?”

I rested my head on her shoulder. “No one cooks as good as you and Dad, you know that.”

Teddi sat on my other side and Gaze was across the table. It’d be the longest I had ever been separated from them.

I needed it. Somehow I knew that fixing all the things that were shattered inside me would take my greatest resource: time.

Teddi wrapped her arm around me. “All I know is I better be getting French pastries mailed to me daily.”

I lifted my head from Mom and set it on Teddi’s shoulder. They were making mush out of my convictions.

Gaze leaned forward. “If your place has an extra bedroom, Pixie and I have never been to France.”

“Always a spot for any of you anytime.” I pushed a smile on my lips. This was good—plans and hopes. They were letting me go, too.

And that probably told me more than anything they knew I needed space.

Teddi rubbed my hand as everyone’s dinners were delivered to the table. “How’s Taylor?”

Maybe Teddi did know now that it had gotten real. So real for us.

“She’s beautiful, empathetic, and giving.” I felt numb coming from my throat.

“And devastated?” She gave me a sad look.

“I think we both are.” I felt my shoulders slump.

“Peaches and I will keep a watch on her.”