Leaning against the upper bunk, head on the mattress, Robin listened to Lennie’s breathing. The best thing I ever did – she said it so often, and meant it every time, but tonight the knowledge was physical, a knot in her stomach. Gently she put an arm over Len’s chest, pressed her nose against the back of her head. A surge of longing – she wanted to grip her, lock her in her arms so she could never get away. She was okay for the moment, Lennie didn’t want to get away, but she was thirteen, well into adolescence. A couple of years ago she’d demanded a starter bra, one of those T-shirt-material harness things, and last year, just before Christmas, she’d started her period. She was growing up – soon she’d want if not to get away, with luck, at least to go, be independent, an adult.

She’d only been eight years older than Lennie was now when she’d had her. Ludicrously young – what had she been thinking? And yet, hadn’t she guided herself right that time? Hadn’t she made the best decision that day on the bus when she shoved the sensible thing aside? She’d trusted her gut and she’d never regretted it. It was time to do it again.

Chapter Eleven

It was light, more or less, but in the shade of the portico, the carriage lamp was still on. Along Russell Road just now, the streetlights had been hazy balls of orange, the trees and bushes that screened the deep front gardens just silhouettes. Robin pulled her jacket round her, the leather cold against her neck, and rang the bell a second time.

Soft footsteps inside then the door opened a crack, stopping at the extent of the chain. A vertical strip of Kath’s face, wary-eyed.

‘Hi,’ said Robin.

The door closed, chain rattling. It opened again but still only partway. Kath was barefoot in pyjamas, arms crossed over the cardigan she had on top.

‘I should have rung, probably, but I wanted to talk to you face to face.’

‘The bell – everyone’s in bed. Dad’s been up all night; he’s only been asleep a couple of hours.’

‘I’m sorry, I didn’t think.’ There was a pause, as if now she’d acknowledged her, Kath expected her to turn and go. ‘Can I come in?’

Another pause but then Kath stood aside.