BooksBarbecue
Back Confess to Me Save as PDF
Chapters (87)
  1. Cover
  2. Also by Sharon Doering
  3. Title Page
  4. Dedication
  5. Prologue
  6. 1
  7. 2
  8. 3
  9. 4
  10. 5
  11. 6
  12. 7
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. 10
  16. 11
  17. 12
  18. 13
  19. 14
  20. 15
  21. 16
  22. 17
  23. 18
  24. 19
  25. 20
  26. 21
  27. 22
  28. 23
  29. 24
  30. 25
  31. 26
  32. 27
  33. 28
  34. 29
  35. 30
  36. 31
  37. 32
  38. 33
  39. 34
  40. 35
  41. 36
  42. 37
  43. 38
  44. 39
  45. 40
  46. 41
  47. 42
  48. 43
  49. 44
  50. 45
  51. 46
  52. 47
  53. 48
  54. 49
  55. 50
  56. 51
  57. 52
  58. 53
  59. 54
  60. 55
  61. 56
  62. 57
  63. 58
  64. 59
  65. 60
  66. 61
  67. 62
  68. 63
  69. 64
  70. 65
  71. 66
  72. 67
  73. 68
  74. 69
  75. 70
  76. 71
  77. 72
  78. 73
  79. 74
  80. 75
  81. 76
  82. 77
  83. 78
  84. 79
  85. Author’s Note
  86. Acknowledgements
  87. About the Author

I stopped reading and raised my eyes to Holly’s. “What’s NA?”

She dropped her head an inch, stared at me, stone-eyed like I was stupid. “Narcotics Anonymous,” she said.

“Oh,” I said, and started the letter from the top.

Melinda,
Step 9 here. You’re probably familiar. For you, it was AA. For me, NA. Potato potahto, addiction is fueled by the desperate need to escape emotional pain. Mostly bullshit, these steps. God this, God that, Ask Him to remove our character defects. Trust in God because you’re pathetic and not capable like you’ve always suspected. Anyway, if God’s steering the boat, why’d He sink my boat in the first place? And if He messed me up so bad that I had to get hooked on drugs, why would He help me now?

I’m guessing the religious stuff makes you cringe too. I go along with it though for the meetings, hearing other people’s stories, what rituals help them. That has been useful.

Anyway, Step 9. Make amends to people we’ve harmed except when it would injure them or others. I’m stuck on this. Me writing this letter pretty much guarantees someone will be injured. It might be you. But what I feel that’s more important than even maybe putting you in danger is this: someone owes you an apology. I am sorry for what happened to you. There. The thing is, and here’s the Pandora’s box I’m leaving on your doorstep. Watch at your own risk. I’ve made copies of the videos.

I should have contacted you earlier, I know.

Basically, this is an apology and an invitation to more trouble. Pretty shitty, I know. I’ve been told I’m cold more than once in my life.

-Sin

“I don’t understand,” I said, my heart feeling fluttery, fragile as a butterfly’s wing. “I don’t understand a single word. And why is it signed Sin?”

“I have no idea,” she said. “This letter was dated a month before Mom was murdered. I didn’t find any videos or flash drives in her apartment. Whatever was on these videos, someone killed her for it.”

“That’s just… crazy.”

“Is it?”

“Yes,” I blurted. “Very crazy.” Even after the texts I’d received, I wasn’t completely sold on the idea that my mom was targeted, that it hadn’t been a robbery gone wrong.

“Mom didn’t live in the city,” Holly said as if she’d read my mind. “She didn’t have much, and whoever broke into her apartment had to know that. She had a damaging or scandalous video of something. Whoever broke in, they took it, and they killed her.”

The recent break-ins came to mind.