“Every time you say his fucking name, I’ll carve mine into your body.” His knife, tainted with my blood, cut through the tape and freed me. He ripped the strip from my mouth, tugged on my arms, and forced me into a kneeling position on the bed. His large hand fisted my hair and brought my mouth to his glistening cock.

“Need you to suck me off.” He pushed between my lips and shoved to the back of my throat. Gagging, I slapped at his hard abs, hands uselessly pressing against his stomach, but he used both fists to hold me flush with his abdomen, smothering my airway as he choked me with his girth.

I flailed, panicking as my lungs burned, as vomit rose in my throat. He yanked out only to thrust in again. In that moment, I no longer existed. I was just a shell, a thing made up of skin and bones, my sole purpose to submit while he pummeled my holes.

Fight, Alex! Find a way out before he completely destroys you.

Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! I covered my ears, my frantic scream gurgling in my throat. His erection gagged me again, and I was certain I’d drown in my own vomit.

“Oh fuuuuck, Lex…” His cum shot down my throat, but I couldn’t stop screaming. He pulled out, and I spewed cum and what little I’d eaten that day onto the floor. He wrenched my hands free from my ears, and I realized I was still wailing. Hysteria didn’t touch the state I was in.

“Knock it off!” He brought his face within inches of mine. “What is wrong with you?”

What was wrong with me?

Everything. Every decision I’d made, every mistake, spawned from cowardice, led to this moment. I was too stupid to live. My gaze flickered to the bed where he’d dropped the knife between cutting me and making me choke on his cum.

Find a way out.

I sucked air into my lungs, catching my breath, and tramped down the need to throw up again. “Water,” I blurted, holding my throbbing head. “I’m too hot. I’m gonna get sick again.”

He glanced down at the vomit at his feet, his mouth twisting with disgust. “It was just a fucking blow job, Lex. Does my dick repulse you that much?”

I shook my head quickly. “No, it-it’s the drugs. I need water.” I hated the meek sound of my voice, despised it. Why couldn’t I be stronger? Why couldn’t I jump to my feet and pound my fist into his face?

Don’t enrage the beast further. There’s only one way out, and you know it.

That was not the same voice of hope from a few minutes ago. That was the real me, the voice of despair who gave cold, hard truth.