“Jewel, I didn’t know what else to do and you know I lost the babysitting job—”

“Well you need to apologize to Hakim,” Jewel snapped. “You’re lucky he’s sympathetic that I got a family full of drama! You did me a favor by letting him know just why I keep my ass as far away from Chicago as I can.”

“I’m sorry.” It was a pitiful apology.

“I stay away so I can stay out of the middle of mess, which it seems like you all are always in,” Jewel continued, letting the floodgates of anger loose. “Everybody’s walking around in circles and nobody’s standing straight. Now you sitting up here pregnant, about to be another Black teen mother, struggling your whole life. Because the odds are that boy is not going to marry you, Shivana. You know that, don’t you?”

I didn’t have the nerve to reply to her lecture. I had no idea what she would think about me killing the baby, so I didn’t even tell her that was at the forefront of my mind.

“Well, what you gonna do?” she finally said, very softly. I had nothing to tell her at that time because I didn’t know what I was going to do.

“Alright, fine,” she finally said. “I’ll call Annette for you. I’ll do your dirty work—this time.”

I gave her the address and number to the shelter, then the names of some of the sisters in charge.

“I guess you need more money,” Jewel said as I hung my head low in shame. I was too proud to ask her for another thing, even though I didn’t have much to live on if I was holding on to five hundred dollars for the abortion.

“I’ll send you some,” Aunt Jewel said. She hung up on me without saying good-bye.

“THAT’S NOT YOUR bed.”

Someone had entered my room so quickly I hadn’t heard. I turned around to see a girl who looked about six feet tall standing behind me. Almost the entire right side of her face was raised in an ugly, serrated, keloidal scar. She looked like she had a swollen jaw because of it. Standing right next to her was a petite high-yellow girl with her hair coiffed like a rooster’s—red color and all. Thing about it was although she was bony as hell, she probably pulled men on skin color alone. She held a child wrapped in a puffy blue snowsuit, even though it wasn’t snowing.

“That gotta be your bed over there,” the tall one said gruffly.