For a moment, I just watch as she leaves the room. I really need tonight to go well. The smell of the cooking food makes my mouth water, but all I care about is where we go from here.

Amelia grabs my hand and pulls me to the couch. “I was just watching Disney. Do you like Disney movies?”

I nod. “I’ve seen a few.”

“My favourite is Zootopia. Mummy says we’ve seen it a million times.”

“A million and one,” Delaney calls from the kitchen.

Amelia giggles.

There’s some cartoon playing on the television, but I barely pay attention as my girl climbs up beside me and watches it. She’s what I look at. Her dark hair curls like Delaney’s, and she has her mother’s delicate features. But her eyes are all mine.

“Here we go.” Delaney carries in two plates laden with food. “I’m not really one for making everyone sit at the table. We usually sit in here and eat dinner together.”

“I don’t want to disrupt your routine.”

“You’re not.” She walks back to the kitchen and returns with her own plate. “Are you ready to change channels, Melly?”

“I’m not changed yet.” Amelia pouts.

“You’ve got plenty of time.”

“Changed?” I ask.

“She’s got an All Blacks shirt she wears for every game. It’s tradition.”

“I love the All Blacks,” Amelia says it so matter-of-factly.

“I got that.” I laugh.

She returns to eating and again I find myself just watching her. Amelia abandons her fork and picks up each piece of potato, each floret of broccoli scooping them into her mouth. I shoot a glance at Delaney who just shakes her head and smiles.

“I should tell her off, but she’s eating her vegetables and that’s a win,” Delaney says.

“I’m not much of a vegetable fan either.” I sigh. “But I do what I have to do.”

Delaney grins. “She takes after you in that regard, then.”

After dinner, Amelia races to her room to change, and I’m left on the sofa with Delaney.

She’s switched channels already, and the game build-up is on. But I’m not paying any attention to that either because there are so many distractions in this house. Those legs, that smile, the love in her eyes for our daughter.

I have pangs over never being a part of this.

Amelia comes running back in and tugs on my hand to pull me to my feet.

“Wait. What? What’s going on?” I ask.

“It’s the national anthem,” Delaney says. “Melly takes it very seriously.”

I smile. “Oh, well in that case …”

Amelia squeezes my hand as I stand. Delaney stands beside me, her hand drifting near mine. I take it, and turn my head to look into her eyes.

I clamp my lips together as Amelia bellows out the song.