“What do you want, Skeevy?” he calls without opening it.

“How do you even know it’s me?”

“Because you always fucking knock like you’re in a horror movie and you just came upon a lone cabin in the wilderness.” He swings the door open, and I’m gratified to see his eyes widen at my makeover. “Where the hell have you been?”

“Oh, just the mall with some friends,” I say casually, possibly stepping on his foot a little as I let myself inside and drop onto Matt’s bed, knowing he’s currently meeting up with his designated Ewing Hall conquest. “The blowout was Jenna’s idea. Priya picked the outfit. And Isabel treated me to the eyeliner so I could get a free makeover. Isn’t that sweet?”

“Is it?” He’s still staring at me, but like I’m a strange, unfamiliar animal, rather than a hot girl who got a spectacular makeover, and it’s really killing my buzz. What is it about these guys and an aversion to a change in hairstyle?

Whatever, it doesn’t matter; it’s not like I’m trying to impress either of them. “It is. And you might like to know that you came up several times on this outing. Of course, they thought we might be a thing after seeing us at the movie together last night, but don’t worry, I let them know you’re single and ready to mingle.”

“I can’t help feeling like I absolutely do not want you meddling in my love life. Ever.” He scowls as he shoves aside the mass of flannel blanket on his bed and sits down on the edge.

“Okay, well, that might be a problem, because I’ve already made us plans for tonight, and they involve a party in your room that includes four of the hottest girls at Camden, three of whom are single.”

“Evie, what the fuck. You invited them here? Why?”

“Matt thought it would be fun to have a poker night,” I tell him, patting Matt’s pillow in lieu of indicating his actual roommate. “Tonight, Salem Grayson, we are going to raise your social profile and introduce you to some hotties.”

“Has anyone used the word ‘hotties’ in the last twenty years?”

“Salem.” I walk and sit at his feet, taking his lightly callused fingers in mine. “This is as well-adjusted as you’re ever gonna get. You know what helps parents get over being expelled for smoking weed in the principal’s office, of all the stupid, godforsaken places? Showing them that you are really and truly changing into a normal human being.”

He pulls his hands away and braces them on the thighs of his basketball shorts. “Sabrina told you why I got expelled?”

Whoops. It honestly hadn’t occurred to me that it was a secret. “What’s the big deal? It’s not like it’s news that you have a … penchant for cannabis.”