"Bring me one who will rescue me! Am I dreaming or dying? Bring me one who knows that between the dream and death there is only one frail step, one who senses that between this murder of the present by a dream, and death, there is only one shallow breath. Bring me one who knows that the dream without exit, without explosion, without awakening, is the passageway to the world of the dead! I want my dress torn and stained!"

A drunken man came up to her with a chair. Of all the chairs in the entire house he had selected a gold one with a red brocade top.

Why couldn't he bring me an ordinary chair?

To single her out for this hierarchic offering was to condemn her.

Now it was going to happen, inevitably.

The night and the Party had barely begun and she was being whisked away on a gold chair with a red brocade top by an abductor who would carry her back to the dark room of her adolescence, to the long white nightgown and hair brush, and to dream of a Party that she could never attend.

Children of the Albatross

CHILDREN OF THE ALBATROSS

Main Characters

MAIN CHARACTERS

Djuna: in “The Sealed Room,” a dancer who as a child lived in an orphanage; her father’s desertion of the family caused her to dislike father figures and to encourage teenaged boys to be themselves; has an affair with one such boy, Paul, who calls her wafer. In “The Café,” she inspires Jay’s painting and reunites Michael with humanity; constructs internal cities from which only Jay, because of ordinariness, can help her escape. Based on what Anaïs Nin called “the mystic Anaïs” (see Mirages).

Paul: Teenager who fears making mistakes because of the demanding nature of his parents, who hire a detective to find him; has sex with Djuna. Based on William Pinckard, a seventeen-year-old boy with whom Nin had a sexual relationship (see Mirages).

Donald: A feminine young man who desires experiences forbidden by his parents; dominated by his lover Michael though he does not demonstrate love adequately; evicted from an apartment for failing to pay rent. Based on poet Robert Duncan (see Mirages).

Michael: College student who pursues Djuna and dominates his lover Donald, with whom he wishes to live peacefully; wants to remain an adolescent. Based on Nin’s cousin Eduardo Sánchez, who had a sexual relationship with Robert Duncan (see Mirages).

Lawrence: Impulsive teenager who shows Djuna a mouse that he dyed blue; with Paul, paints Djuna’s room. Based on Nin’s young friend Pablo (see Mirages).

Lillian: Pianist married to Jay, whom she vows to leave because he does not care about her; has an affair with a stranger. Composite character based on the aggressive aspect of Nin’s personality, which is reflected by her friend Thurema Sokol (see Mirages).