Back Blurred Lines
Chapters (39)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise for Hannah Begbie:
  3. Dedication
  4. Chapter 1
  5. Chapter 2
  6. Chapter 3
  7. Chapter 4
  8. Chapter 5
  9. Chapter 6
  10. Chapter 7
  11. Chapter 8
  12. Chapter 9
  13. Chapter 10
  14. Chapter 11
  15. Chapter 12
  16. Chapter 13
  17. Chapter 14
  18. Chapter 15
  19. Chapter 16
  20. Chapter 17
  21. Chapter 18
  22. Chapter 19
  23. Chapter 20
  24. Chapter 21
  25. Chapter 22
  26. Chapter 23
  27. Chapter 24
  28. Chapter 25
  29. Chapter 26
  30. Chapter 27
  31. Chapter 28
  32. Chapter 29
  33. Chapter 30
  34. Acknowledgements
  35. If you enjoyed Blurred Lines, keep reading for a taste of Hannah Begbie’s first novel Mother.
  36. PROLOGUE
  37. About the Author
  38. Also by Hannah Begbie
  39. About the Publisher

‘They might not love her, they might not agree with her actions, but I think they’ll understand her. They’ll understand her despair at how badly she was treated by her husband. At how she gave Jason stature, children, her love. Then he took it all. Left her with nothing. Just, discarded her. What happens doesn’t come out of nowhere. She’s not a psycho who does the most messed-up thing she can think of. She’s utterly wronged.’

‘Wronged?’

‘Yes?’

‘Your mate Tommy probably felt wronged after the reviews he got for In Golden Square. Didn’t go out and butcher his family though, did he? Let me know if I’ve got that wrong. I’d have to write him an apology.’

Becky feels her foundations shift. She hasn’t got anything solid after all. She has a whole script and yet suddenly it’s all blown into nothing substantial, and so easily. She sees the reviews forming. ‘Implausible.’ ‘Unlikeable.’

‘Haneke gets away with it every time,’ she smiles. ‘People butchered in their homes. Cutting their throats for effect. He doesn’t worry about making people likeable. He says: this is who we might be, if we strip the rest away.’

‘I fucking hate Haneke films.’

‘No you don’t. I read your review of Caché. You gave it four stars.’

His mouth curls into a half-smile. ‘It’s a four- or five-star film. I still hated it.’

‘So maybe you’ll hate my Medea but still give it an OK review.’

‘It certainly sounds well-intentioned.’

‘I’ll join forces with Tommy and pay to have you killed.’

He laughs. Clinks her glass with his own. ‘Biggest compliment you can pay a critic, threatening to dismember them. It’s only then that we know you actually give a shit about what we say.’

She sees it then, beyond his confidence, the part of him that is both vain and anxious. He is courted here only because his reviews are read. But he wants more than that. She understands that. When he teases her, her discomfort flatters him. The moment his opinion can’t touch her, he’ll hate her instead, albeit from a new distance. Is it only women who have to work this hard? she wonders. Or is it just that the exchange between men is more straightforward? Is it the possibility of sex that makes it so much more difficult? Medea comes to her again; resolute, cutting away the trappings of her gender, ready to be unloved, loathed even, for all time. Is that bravery, or has she simply lost too much to bother saving anything?

She wonders what she might say to Alex, were the boot on the other foot. But she cannot discount the fact he might review her work in the future and thus she cannot offer him anything, really, beyond a passing entertainment and the threat that, maybe, if her stars align, one day she might matter like Matthew does.