Chapters (39)
- Cover
- Praise for Hannah Begbie:
- Dedication
- Chapter 1
- Chapter 2
- Chapter 3
- Chapter 4
- Chapter 5
- Chapter 6
- Chapter 7
- Chapter 8
- Chapter 9
- Chapter 10
- Chapter 11
- Chapter 12
- Chapter 13
- Chapter 14
- Chapter 15
- Chapter 16
- Chapter 17
- Chapter 18
- Chapter 19
- Chapter 20
- Chapter 21
- Chapter 22
- Chapter 23
- Chapter 24
- Chapter 25
- Chapter 26
- Chapter 27
- Chapter 28
- Chapter 29
- Chapter 30
- Acknowledgements
- If you enjoyed Blurred Lines, keep reading for a taste of Hannah Begbie’s first novel Mother.
- PROLOGUE
- About the Author
- Also by Hannah Begbie
- About the Publisher
The film is nearly over, but Becky knows that two more people are yet to visit her from the screen. In an interview ahead of the film’s premiere, Emilia had spoken about how Sharon convinced her to stay in the role, disclosing a new plan for the film’s final scene. It had ‘moved me deeply, as a piece of art. It puts life in all its pain into the heart of the story’, Emilia had said.
That scene now begins to play.
Becky has read enough reviews to know that the moment is coming, but it still kicks her in the gut when Medea’s grave is visited by her grieving sister, Chalciope. Played by Amber Heath. A theatrical metafictive flourish.
On screen, Amber lays flowers then a tender kiss on the freshly dug ground.
Becky suddenly wishes that she had not seen the film on a day like today, when she was sure to feel even worse later on. That she had allowed herself some time to recover from seeing Amber’s face, beamed ten feet high on the cinema screen, tearful and reproachful, mourning the world’s women lost to betrayal and despair.
The credits begin to roll and – there she is – Becky’s second visitor.
Siobhan’s name has ended up in the credits for Medea, thanks to her taking a new job as Development Executive at Julia Peppard’s company, Bottom Line. Siobhan joined them only a few days before Bottom Line announced their deal to acquire all rights in Medea from Kingfisher Films.
When the news broke, Siobhan had texted Becky: I didn’t plan that one btw. It was the first contact between them since the day Siobhan resigned.
In a year of thinking things over, it is the slap to Siobhan’s face that still makes Becky feel sick with shame. Its viciousness. The fear behind it. The desire to crush and intimidate anyone who might expose her. She has gone over that moment many times, but still, her inability to take Siobhan’s censure on the chin, instead assaulting her, is something that she cannot forgive herself for.
The only silver lining is that it gives her a vanishingly small moment of fellow-feeling with Adam. That slap was not the totality of who she is. It is not her whole truth. And so when Adam had asked her to please believe that what he did to her is not who he is, now she at least understands what he means. It doesn’t change much, it doesn’t excuse anything, but she knows what he means.
A few days after Siobhan texted, Becky had taken the strength gained from a rare good night’s sleep, and the comfort of her daughter sleeping close by, and the sun beaming through a gap in the curtains, and decided to call her. So, without breakfast, without allowing herself time to doubt and unpick the instinct, she picked up the phone and dialled.