Ben took the stairs three at a time. His father, as usual the last to join the dots about what was going on in his own house, shambled along behind.

It took time for Ben to make sense of what he saw at the top of the stairs. The newel from the staircase had come off again and was in his hand. The blackjack game was in an uproar, with Josie, her sister Lucie, Tony Eastaugh and Grandpa, of all people, screaming incoherently at each other. The card table had been upended. Grandpa was hurling cards like lost betting tickets. Tonsure Man was trying his best to calm Grandpa down, while Tony Eastaugh appeared to be delivering a chairman’s speech, his prosthetic leg wobbling, calling the meeting to order, but nobody was listening. Lou and Principal Oxenford were observing from the kitchen, detached and amused, over the saloon door. Dealer Carl was nowhere in the exploded card game—because Dealer Carl was out on the balcony, where the real action was. Kids and surfers were yelling and pushing each other and two stoned girls were screaming. Daniel was throwing punches like an out-of-control millwheel. Dog was somewhere at the bottom of the pack.

Just as he didn’t know how it began, Ben couldn’t work out how it ended. Unlike movie fights, real fights are over the minute you’ve realised they have started. Daniel and the kids disappeared from the house amid more yelled threats. Red Cap’s mother was shouting at Carl, while Tony Eastaugh was calling ‘Order!’ at Dog, who was wiping blood off his mouth.

Ben felt something crunch underfoot. He looked down: a Kyoto teacup lay in shards. From the crack in the next floorboard, a jagged half of a beautiful saucer protruded.

‘Just get out!’

Ben looked at his dad.

‘The lot of you, get the fuck out of my house! Go on, fuck off, the lot of you!’

Ben had never seen Dad like this, in a hot rage, waving his arms, yelling and screaming. He wasn’t disturbed to see Gordon crack up. He was proud.

Getting them out took longer than the fight. People were reacting in bizarre ways to Gordon’s outburst. Josie had the temerity to shake her fist at Lou for not having finished installing the StairLift. Red Cap had words with Gordon about using that kind of language to his mother and aunt. Japan Ned told Gordon it was going to be ‘Shit out tomorrow’, flashed his white teeth and flung out an unreciprocated high-five.