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Back Big Boned
Chapters (67)
  1. Big Boned
  2. CONTENTS
  3. Dedication
  4. 1
  5. 2
  6. 3
  7. 4
  8. 5
  9. 6
  10. 7
  11. 8
  12. 9
  13. 10
  14. 11
  15. 12
  16. 13
  17. 14
  18. 15
  19. 16
  20. 17
  21. 18
  22. 19
  23. 20
  24. 21
  25. 22
  26. 23
  27. 24
  28. 25
  29. 26
  30. 27
  31. 28
  32. 29
  33. 30
  34. 31
  35. 32
  36. 33
  37. 34
  38. 35
  39. 36
  40. 37
  41. 38
  42. 39
  43. 40
  44. 41
  45. 42
  46. 43
  47. 44
  48. 45
  49. 46
  50. 47
  51. 48
  52. 49
  53. 50
  54. 51
  55. 52
  56. 53
  57. 54
  58. 55
  59. One Month Later
  60. Acknowledgments
  61. About the Author
  62. Copyright
  63. About the Publisher
  64. Backad 1
  65. Backad 2
  66. Backad 3
  67. Backad 4

“And yet last night you were kissing that guy under a sprinkler,” she said, eyeballing me. “Maybe this world you’re referring to is not as unrealistic as you think. Maybe your view on the world is actually the outdated one, fueled by your own faulty beliefs about yourself. You’re still living in a world where plus-sized models have never looked hot on Instagram and Lizzo never took to the stage.”

“The kissing was an accident!” I said.

“There’re no such things as accidents,” she replied.

“Now you sound like Xander Orange,” I said.

“Maybe he’s right about that one.”

“Fine, then it was this weird thing that happened because we were caught up in a moment and there was fake rain and running and painting and we thought we were going to get caught, but we didn’t so there was relief and excitement and, and, and . . . and!” I huffed loudly and folded my arms. “Just and.”

“And?” she probed.

“Yes, and!”

“And what?”

“And have I told you how much I hate the body positivity movement on Instagram.” I sat straight up now.

“Why?” she asked.

“Well, it’s just one more way to make the rest of us feel crappy about ourselves. Because if you’re not totally happy with your curves and embracing them and posting pictures of yourself in bikinis, then there’s something wrong with you. It’s like, if you’re fat these days, you have to be positive and happy about it. You have to be okay to show it off to the world. There’s no middle ground. What if I don’t want to be fat? Am I then betraying my kind, who are all waving the flag against fat shaming and being happy with who they are? Maybe I’m not happy with who I am.”

“And maybe that has nothing to do with being fat?” she said.

“Huh?” I looked at her and blinked.

“Do you think if you were thin you would be happy with yourself?”

“Uh . . . yes!” I said.

She shook her head. “I don’t think you would. I think you would still find something to criticize, and still find a way of putting yourself down.”

I shook my head and then tears welled up. “No, I don’t think so. I think I would be happy if I was skinny because then all the bad things wouldn’t have happened to me.”

“Tell me about the bad things.” Vicki leaned in closer and locked eyes with me.