Chapters (50)
- Title Page
- Copyright Page
- Dedication Page
- Contents
- One
- Two
- Three
- Four
- Five
- Six
- Seven
- Eight
- Nine
- Ten
- Eleven
- Twelve
- Thirteen
- Fourteen
- Fifteen
- Sixteen
- Seventeen
- Eighteen
- Ninteen
- Twenty
- Twenty-one
- Twenty-two
- Twenty-three
- Twenty-four
- Twenty-five
- Twenty-six
- Twenty-seven
- Twenty-eight
- Twenty-nine
- Thirty
- Thirty-one
- Thirty-two
- Thirty-three
- Thirty-four
- Thirty-five
- Thirty-six
- Thirty-seven
- Thirty-eight
- Thirty-nine
- Forty
- Forty-one
- Forty-two
- Epilogue
- Letter From the Author
- Acknowledgements
- About the Author
I peeled myself off her. ‘No. Not yet. I’m not in the right mood. Just . . . please stop saying sorry.’
‘OK.’
‘So . . .’ I took a deep breath. ‘Let me tell you what else happened today.’
That night was the first night that we didn’t have sex. Although we cuddled, we kept our underwear on. I feigned exhaustion and Charlie was soon asleep, her arms still wrapped around me.
I lay and looked at her in the semi-darkness. Her chest rose and fell, her hand twitched in her sleep. She made little murmuring noises. I loved her. There was no doubt about that. But, for the first time, I wasn’t sure if I believed her.
Twenty-one
Twenty-one
Monday arrived. I woke up early with butterflies in my stomach and had a last-minute panic while cleaning my teeth. Was I doing the right thing? I had a word with myself in the bathroom mirror, an out-loud pep talk that made Charlie ask, ‘Who were you talking to?’ when I went back into the bedroom.
‘Myself.’
‘First sign of madness.’ She looked me up and down. I was wearing my new work clothes. It wasn’t the kind of job that required a suit (if I’d turned up wearing one I think I would have been sent home) but I had new jeans, a new white shirt, new Converse trainers. ‘You look hot.’
‘Thanks. So do you.’
She examined herself in the full-length mirror, at her own work clothes: the pencil skirt, the blouse with the Peter Pan collar. ‘No. I definitely don’t look hot when I’m Charlotte.’
‘But it was Charlotte that first attracted me,’ I reminded her.
‘Yes. In an eye clinic.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘Better go. You don’t want to be late on your first day.’
I stood at the door, crutch in hand. I didn’t need it to walk around the flat any more but still found it necessary when walking any distance. Charlie and I had agreed not to travel to work together because, Charlie told me, she was always grumpy on her journey into work and she didn’t want me to suffer, especially when it was so important for me to arrive at the office feeling relaxed.
‘I’m nervous,’ I said.
Charlie came over and kissed me on the cheek. ‘You’ll be great. Don’t worry. Call me at lunchtime, OK?’
‘Maybe we could meet for lunch?’
She ruffled my hair. ‘I expect your boss or new colleagues will take you out for lunch. You normally get treated extra-special on your first day.’
