But she’s already reaching into my boxers and wrapping her hand around me.

“Please,” she says, gazing up at me, her eyes so big and bright they almost hurt to look at.

I can’t deny this woman a single thing, so I nod, and she slides her tongue up my shaft. She circles the tip before taking me in her mouth, warm and wet. Gasping, I grip the edge of the dresser as she works me with her hand, sliding up and down in rhythm with her lips, taking me deeper each time.

Flashes of the last three months play like a movie sequence in my mind: that first day, when she called me Brian; when she stormed over to Happy Endings, all fiery and gorgeous, accusing me of sending the Book Club Sluts to sabotage her event; the moment I realized she was BookshopGirl; dancing in Maine; Josie reading steamy scenes out loud at the bar; kissing her on the beach; kissing her at the store, in her apartment.

But as incredible as this feels, something is missing. It’s like she’s tucked all her tenderness back inside, the hidden softness I’ve spent weeks trying to uncover, the warmth between us, all the sweetness of our past week together.

Somehow, I’ve fucked this up. But all of this, everything, was for her. I just want Josie to get everything she’s dreamed of. Everything she deserves.

Even if I could find the words to say any of that right now, I’m not capable of speaking. So I lean back and close my eyes, surrendering myself to the mercy of this woman and her magic mouth.

“Josie…” Her name on my lips feels like a prayer. I don’t know if I believe in God, but I believe in Josie, and I believe in us. “Josie, Josie, fuck, Josie—wait.”

I need to be closer to her, to feel her body next to mine and see her gorgeous green eyes. So I reach under her arms and haul her up. She’s startled and flushed, and I catch a glimpse of something—sadness?—in her expression.

“What’s wrong?” she asks. “You don’t…want this?”

The hurt in her voice is another dagger in my chest. “Josie, I will always want this. I’ll always want you, but can we—”

She comes up on tiptoe and puts her mouth on mine, silencing me. Message received: she doesn’t want to talk. I’m not sure exactly what she wants, but I’m desperate to make this better, so I return her kisses, hard and deep.