Raymond    Is there something eating you, Mr Kowalski? Something’s eating, you seem intent on trying to needle me, is something eating you?

Bert     Eating me?

Raymond    Yes, something eat— you’re trying to needle me.

Bert    Why would I want to needle you, Ray? I don’t even know you, remember?

Bert picks up the toilet roll and goes into the bathroom. Charles stares at Raymond, puzzled.

Charles    . . . You were . . . I mean, on the tele . . . you weren’t –

Raymond    Take no notice of the drug fiend. I’ll be having words with Mervyn, see if we can’t get him off the production.

Charles    I must say, Raymond, I mean, the poor chap’s chronically bronchial –

Raymond    Don’t be – are you –

Charles    He’s coarse but, I mean, his condition is –

Raymond (laughing)     Wake up, you idiot! He’s an opium addict. If anything has damaged his lungs, it’s smoking opium.

A long pause. Charles lets Raymond’s words sink in.

Charles    . . . Opium? I didn’t –

Raymond    Of course you didn’t.

Pause.

Charles    You mean . . . ? You mean he was . . . he was smoking opium?

Raymond    You want me to spell it out?

Charles    I can’t . . .

Raymond    Well, you’d better: you’d better wake up and believe it.

Charles    And I offered – I mean, you’re positive?

Raymond    Bert Kowlaski’s a notorious drug fiend. He’s been fired from every circus from here to Arkansas. Notorious.

Charles    Oh dear.

Raymond    If you only knew.

Pause.

Charles    But I . . . I thought, I thought you didn’t know him, Raymond?

Raymond    I don’t know him, but I know of him. He’s bad news and I suggest quite strongly that you stay clear of him until I can have a discreet word in Mervyn’s ear.

Charles    Oh my! I didn’t . . . and I . . . opium indeed. I’ve heard it sends people, heard it sends them . . .

Raymond    Insane?

Charles    Does it? In your, in your experience, Raymond? Does it send them – I mean, that could be dangerous. It could be dangerous: insanity.

Raymond    Not could, is.

Charles    Really?

Raymond    Yes. Insanity is dangerous.

Charles    And you think, you think –

Raymond (pointing towards the bathroom)     You need any more proof? The man’s half demented already. You heard him going on and on and on about Wichita, ranting, ranting on and on about Wichita . . . the man’s delusional, Charles, the man’s delusional and the last thing Mervyn needs is delusional Munchkins on his production.

Charles    . . . You don’t think it could make him turn, turn him and make him turn violent, do you?

Raymond    There’s no telling with these fiends: violence is a possibility.

Charles    Oh dear.

Charles sits down and shakes his head. Raymond pours him a glass of whisky and hands it to him.

Raymond    Here. Drink this.

Charles    I don’t really –

Raymond    It calms the nerves. Trust me.

Charles    Huh, but –

Raymond    Just drink it for heaven’s sake.