‘Just pour it, babes. Shit’s going down here,’ she instructed. ‘Simi. What happened?’

Simi bowed her head, embarrassed, as she recounted her sighting of Oscar, his auburn-haired companion and that incriminating red velvet cupcake.

‘Oh, Sim. That sucks,’ said Jemima leaning in to hug her.

‘No, Jem,’ said Simi pushing her back, ‘I’ve been so blinkered, I didn’t see this at all!’

‘Let’s go round his gaff. Find out who this scrub is. Get medieval on her arse,’ said Meagan, crushing her coaster.

Meagan had been waiting for an excuse to dismantle Oscar and cheating on Simi was an even better reason than his grotesque cycling gear.

‘Hang on. How do we know it’s not just a friend?’ said Jemima putting a calming hand on Meagan.

‘A friend that he goes on bike rides with… and snogs in the street…?’ said Simi.

‘Oh,’ Jemima replied.

‘So who is she?’ Meagan asked.

Simi pursed her lips. ‘I think her name’s Sophie. He introduced us once when I met him for lunch. He said she was his team leader. I checked her out on Insta. She has three thousand followers. How is that possible? She works in a bank.’

‘It’s the hair, babes. Gingers stick together. It’s like a cult. So, what do you want us to do?’ asked Meagan, hoping Simi would suggest ordering five hundred pizzas to her office.

‘I don’t want you to do anything. Oscar’s the poop. I can’t do anything about him so it’s time to make a change in me – today,’ Simi said gathering herself.

Meagan looked at Simi properly for the first time that evening. The rawness of the break-up was evident but there was also a steeliness. No matter what life threw at Simi, she always fought her way back.

‘I think there’s something in your idea about you asking guys out for me. I could learn so much just by dating someone I would never normally consider,’ Simi implored.

Jemima shook her head. ‘Darling, think this through. You’ve just got out of a relationship. The body is still warm. Why would you want to get into something now?’ she said trying to wedge herself between Meagan and Simi.

‘This isn’t about finding a boyfriend. It’s about retraining my brain to not keep making the same mistakes. If I ask the guys out, I’ll just go for another version of Oscar or Jason or Ade and the same thing will happen over and over again until I’m Zsa Zsa Gabor, dead and divorced a billion times,’ said Simi.

Meagan sat back sipping her wine as Jemima continued her futile attempts to derail Simi’s plans. Just because Jemima was terrified of men it didn’t mean Simi had to be. Meagan admired Simi’s desire to recalibrate and if she could help her move on from Oscar, she would. She’d only concocted this idea as a way of getting Simi to go to her audition but actually, it might do her some good. They had sat by the sidelines for long enough. It was time to get on the court and give Simi some much-needed coaching.