The train lurched. Willow grabbed his arm briefly to steady herself, then offered him an apologetic smile; conversation wasn’t an option with the noise. She was wearing make-up, which she never did. It made her look older, though no more beautiful. As Seb smiled back, he wished that he had the right to put his arm around her for no real reason, just to feel her pressed closely to his side. And he thought he could cheerfully throttle Alex, who had had the right, and apparently cared so little about it that he was willing to break up with Willow simply for being friends with him. Seb mentally shook his head in disbelief. God, if Willow was his – if he could be with her the way he longed to be; if he could actually go into a room with her and shut the door and tell her how he felt with words, with his lips; hear her say the same things back while she stroked her fingers through his hair – then he wouldn’t care who the hell she was friends with. Who in his right mind would? No matter how much Willow cared about him, she would never cheat on Alex, never; did the cabrón not know that?

By now, Seb had a lot of practice in keeping thoughts like these buried. As he entertained himself with fantasies of dragging Alex to one side and telling him in great detail exactly what an idiot he was – perhaps throwing in a punch now and then to emphasize the point – the uppermost part of his mind was busy concentrating on the car around them; the advertisements; the people. Willow could have sensed what he was feeling if she’d tried, but Seb knew she wouldn’t. From the start, it was as if they’d had an agreement: he wouldn’t make the fact he was in love with her too obvious, and she’d pretend not to notice it.

As the train rattled its way through the tunnels, Seb supposed he should be glad that Willow and Alex had broken up. But it was obvious how deeply they were still in love with each other. Even across the crowded car, he could sense the emotional ties that bound them; he was sure they’d manage to patch things up soon. Meanwhile, feeling how much pain Willow was in was agony to Seb, so that he found himself in the bizarre position of wanting to pummel Alex until he saw reason and made things up with her. Seb smiled wryly. He wouldn’t really have believed it, but he wanted Willow’s happiness more than he wanted his own.