She shuffles a few papers, looking through a file for something that she wants to read out loud.

Nothing happened between us that day. Not on that first day, there in my school office. I mean, there was … I could feel a certain … he was close to me, when he pulled his chair over so we could look through some of the catalogs on my desk … there were a few points where his leg would brush up against mine and he would hold it … hold himself up against me like that … not in any sort of obvious way, I don’t mean that, but so that we could both … you know … register it. That we were touching. His leg up against mine … and I didn’t pull back from it either. (Beat.) I fully acknowledge that right now—I might not have on that day, I might’ve said you were crazy or seeing things or imagining whatever … but I can see it all fairly clearly now and yes … I knew that he was pushing me in those first moments, sort of just gently pushing me to see what was possible … and what wasn’t. (Beat.) Obviously, contact with my leg was “possible.” (Beat.) And it went on from there. For a long time after that. (Beat.) It’s difficult to say what began it … how I let it go as far as it went, but I mean, how do most affairs begin in the first place? Hmmmmm? Because something is missing in the first place … and obviously, that was the case with Eric and me as well. (Beat.) Eric is a kind man … he’s decent and gentle … I think when we talk he hears me and responds, doesn’t speak down to me in that way that successful people can do sometimes … but he was not a great lover. He was not someone who took your breath away in the bedroom and that’s just … that is simply a fact. A fact of life, my life with him … and our life as a couple. I think that I bring him pleasure—I know I can make him orgasm, or “cum” or however you want to say it … and the evidence of that with men is … you know … much, much clearer with a man than the other way around. So, slowly, along the way, I became one of those people. Someone who lied in bed. Said it was “good” … that I was satisfied, but that was not the truth. To this day … that is not the truth. With Eric. (Beat.) But I love him. I do. I think I’ve proved that now … along the way, with all that’s happened, but … it’s always nice to know. To hear it. So, yes: I love my husband. (Beat.) We’ve gone through so much together … over the years and the struggling to have children. It’s not easy. Not for a man and certainly not for a “man of color.” It speaks to something, a deep rooted sense of self and, and …