Alice took the cement steps back up to the road, crossed it, and jogged toward home. She pushed the door open, glad she’d remembered to leave it unlocked, and stepped into the quiet interior, lights still on in the kitchen and the living room. She turned them off, and went upstairs. Passing through the bedroom, she could hear the rhythmic staccato breathing of Jake that meant he was in a deep sleep. She undressed, bundling her clothes together and pushing them toward the bottom of the laundry basket, then got under the hot pulse of the shower, letting the water warm her up, soothe her muscles, and wash away the sand that ran off her body in dark rivulets. She shampooed and conditioned her hair and soaped herself completely with Jake’s Irish Spring twice. She stopped shivering, and the taste of salt in her mouth went away, but she turned the water off and stepped out of the shower only when her legs felt like they could no longer support her.

In a fresh set of pajamas she got under the covers quietly and lay on her back, and told herself she needed to make some decisions. When the police came to question her—and they would come—she’d tell them that Gina had come to her door, and that Alice had told her she was too tired to talk, and that Gina was very drunk, and maybe on drugs. She’d wanted to go swimming but Alice refused, and so she left. They couldn’t prove otherwise, not after Alice laundered the pajamas and took another shower to make sure there was no other evidence. She could do that early in the morning, before Jake woke. How soon would the police come? How soon would Gina be missed?

She closed her eyes, and she was back in the cold, deep water, Gina asking for help. Alice told herself there was no way she would have been able to save her, even if she’d wanted to. She’d barely saved herself from the tide. And Gina was incapacitated. She’d gotten what she wanted—all the beautiful lies about fame and money and the world telling her how special she was—and it had clearly been killing her. And maybe because her own life was such a shit show, she’d decided to mess with Alice’s life, to pass judgment, because Alice had actually found someone to love who loved her back.

No, she couldn’t have saved Gina even if she’d wanted to. She’d be dead now, too, if she’d tried to save them both. Gina would have dragged them both under the water. There was nothing Alice could have done.

Satisfied with these thoughts, Alice turned over onto her stomach and fell happily asleep.

Chapter 16

Now