Alice went up the stairs, feeling good about controlling her feelings in front of Jake. During the drive back in the car, she told herself that she’d barely even bitten Gina, that her teeth had only just broken the skin, and that it had been Gina’s fault anyway. Gina was the one who’d grabbed her violently, and she had just been trying to get away. It was nothing. And then she told herself that the conversation in the backyard hadn’t actually happened, and that the night was merely annoying. If she believed that, it kept the anger she felt toward Gina from rising up in her and making her want to scream. She brushed her teeth, then changed into pajama bottoms and a threadbare T-shirt.

Under the covers, she carefully composed her body, shut her eyes, and began to try to relax. It had been a nice dinner at Gina’s family’s house. Nothing more. But the words she’d tried to erase kept coming back. Gina calling Jake “that fucking creep.” Mrs. Bergeron’s condescending tone, talking to Alice like she was some little girl. And then she remembered the feeling when she’d bitten down on Gina’s hand. Her body was so tight that it was beginning to tremble. While Jake was applying his face cream in the bathroom, Alice slid out from the covers and got off the bed. “Want anything from downstairs?” she asked Jake, and he shook his head.

In the kitchen she made herself a White Russian, heavy on the vodka, and told herself to drink it slowly, to not be like her mother. She drank half of it in short, small sips, and began to feel better. Of course they’d be critical. They didn’t know what she had with Jake. Or maybe they did know, and they were just jealous. That made a lot more sense. As she was making herself a second drink, she heard a very light tapping and thought for a moment that Jake was coming down the stairs. She stepped out into the living room. There was the tapping sound again, and she realized someone was knocking on the door. She went and peered through the eyehole. It was Gina.

Chapter 14

Now