Which means Daphne didn’t see those texts, which means – surely – I have another chance to make things right. At the moment, that thought is the only thing keeping me going.

I flinch every time I remember the look on her face as she handed me my phone. I can’t even bear to think of the hurt I’ve caused her. There has to be a way to mend this. There just has to be.

I lift my phone off the arm of the sofa. The time is 11.47 p.m. In twelve minutes, all this will disappear, and even though I have no idea where or when I’ll end up, I know that I have to find her. I have to tell her the truth – about everything. I have to somehow show her how much she means to me.

And preferably not by turning up on the doorstep with a load of creepy signs.

Harv stuffs another large fistful of sweets into his mouth. Clearly, that pint of Guinness was the beginning of a slippery slope, because we’ve now emptied a packet and a half of Haribo between us, in addition to the large kebab and chips we had on the Tube home.

If this was reality, I’d be considering staging an intervention.

I check my phone again: 11.48. It’s like time is purposely slowing down, just to mess with me.

‘Ben, come on,’ Harv says quietly.

‘What?’

He nods at the armrest. ‘Stop looking at your phone. She’s not going to text you now.’

‘No. Yeah. I know.’

I lay it back down and we watch the Walking Dead guy doing his heart-warming stalker act in silence for a bit. And then, still looking at the TV, Harv suddenly says: ‘You will be OK, man. Honestly. You and Daff, I mean.’

‘Yeah.’ I breathe out shakily. ‘I hope so, but I’m not so sure.’

‘Yeah, well, that’s your natural pessimism talking,’ he says. ‘You need to tap into your inner optimist.’

‘I don’t think I’ve got one.’

‘Well, fucking get one.’ Harv mutes Love Actually and turns to look at me. ‘Look, man, this situation is going to require some serious effort if you want to fix it. You screwed up big time.’

‘Yeah, thanks, Harv. You don’t need to remind me.’

‘Well clearly I do, because you’re not going to get Daphne back by wallowing in your own misery, are you? You have to believe in yourself a bit more, otherwise why the hell should she believe in you?’

I shrug. ‘Self-belief doesn’t exactly come naturally to me.’

He rolls his eyes. ‘Self-pity, on the other hand, you’ve got coming out of your ears.’