Her wheel slows and then speeds back up. “I didn’t give it back,” she says.

“Well, whatever you did, you didn’t take it, did you? So, pardon me if we don’t give up on the opinion of someone who can’t understand caring enough to do something about it.”

Chapter 71

Sarah

Master wants whiskey in the parlor for him and his guest, and Missus wants sherry, so Annie brings both bottles in for the three of them.

I bring Master Thomas upstairs and refill his wash pitcher with water, but then I leave him to undress and get himself to bed like he’s been doing since Henry shamed him into it.

When I get downstairs, I hear Master in his study and the Tennessee man and Missus in the parlor. I don’t waste a second.

I knock, and before he gets an answer out I slip inside the study.

Master stands at his bookshelf, running his finger along the spines, searching for something particular. He glances at me and gets right back to looking.

“What is it, Sarah?”

“You going to sell me out to Tennessee, Master?”

He stops his searching and looks at me with eyes cold as the moon. “Do you wish to stay here?”

“Yes, sir.”

“I really should sell you to Tennessee, as ungrateful as you’ve been.”

“I’m sorry, Master. I’ll be better. But please don’t sell me out there.”

I need to stay put for when Henry comes. He’ll never find me in Tennessee, in all that wilderness. There’s a quiet voice in my head that says I’ll wait forever waiting on Henry, but he said he’s coming back to get me free and I choose, against my nature, to trust and believe.

“I have given you everything you need to be happy and content here and instead you’re sullen and sulking.”

“No, sir. I appreciate everything. I won’t never sulk again,” I say.

“Maybe I should sell you on to get rid of a bad apple before it festers.” He turns his back to me and runs his finger across the books, lifting one and thumbing through its pages.

“Master,” I say, and I’m about to tell him that I’m with child and I’m worth more to keep than sell until the baby comes, but I can’t do it. I can’t betray our child, and I won’t say that it’s his, because it ain’t. Instead, I get down on my knees and clasp my hands. “Please, Master, sir. Don’t let that man take me away. I’ll be good. I’ll do everything just like you want me to. Please.”

And please let Henry come quickly, I think. I can’t stand to stay here much longer. I can’t keep bowing and scraping and smiling in front of this man who I hate.

On my knees, begging like a dog, I think that if I wasn’t waiting for Henry, it would be better for me to go to Tennessee. Away from Red, away from the overseer who I hear is coming back, away from Master who thinks he can tell me what to feel.