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Contents ( 27)
  1. A Midsummer Tights Dream
  2. Dedication
  3. Contents
  4. Back on the showbiz express
  5. Winter of Love
  6. I’m not an ice cream, I’m a human being!
  7. There’s no people like show people
  8. Eat the boat!
  9. Human glue
  10. Calf love
  11. Don’t forget your Bottom
  12. My corkers are on the move
  13. He’s a rusty heathen crow
  14. The ladder of showbiz
  15. Good-bye to a Tree Sister
  16. The hamster slippers of life
  17. A naturally cracking kisser
  18. Tunneling for his life
  19. Return of Cain the Bad
  20. Warming up my Bottom
  21. The fall of Dother Hall
  22. A Midsummer Tights Dream
  23. Tallulah’s glossary
  24. Other Works
  25. Copyright
  26. Back Ads
  27. About the Publisher

We trooped up the stairs past the dorms and then up the narrow stairs that led on to the roof.

When we got there we discovered that Bob had put a Danger Area—absolutely NO Admittance. Dangerous tarpaulin notice across the stairs to the roof with a bit of ribbon to stop us going there.

Vaisey climbed over it, and me and Flossie walked straight through. Bob’s not around anyway. Probably gone off to comb his bob. We had a look on the roof but apart from a flapping tarpaulin held down with bricks there was nothing up there. It was chilly and lonely. Leaning over the parapet, I could just about see the dark outline of Woolfe Academy. I thought about Charlie over there. Not thinking about the thing that he wants us to forget about.

Oh yes, I am sure he wants to forget about the thing.

Forget about snogging a person and … and leading that person on. And pretending to like a person’s knees.

Well, I don’t think I can be friends with a boy like that.

Whoever he is.

I forget.

As we went back down into the dorm, Flossie pointed at the ceiling and said to me, “That tarpaulin is the only thing between us and the sky. Vaisey found a dead pigeon on her bedside table last night, didn’t you, Vaisey?”

Vaisey shook her curls around and said cheerfully, “Yeah, but it was just the one and it looked a bit depressed.”

Flossie said, “Well, it would be depressed, it was dead.”

Vaisey said, “No, but before that, you know, it looked like it didn’t have any mates.”

I said, “Let me get this right, Vaisey, are you saying that a pigeon committed suicide?”

Vaisey went a bit red. “Well, it looked upset.”

“Did you find a suicide note in its beak?”

Then we noticed that the curtain round Jo’s bed was drawn. We had a little peak through and Jo was lying on her bed looking at some letters. I bet they are from Phil. She looked up with her mouth all turned down like Matilda. I did my best smile, but she looked down at her letters again. Oh dear.

Flossie was rummaging through her drawers and said, “This will cheer you up, Jo. I’ve got some cheeky new corker holders.”

She held up a polka-dot lacy bra to show me and Vaisey.

It looked a bit on the large side. We went and poked our heads through Jo’s curtain. Flossie was dangling her corker holder in front of Jo. She said, “Look at these beauties.”

I was still looking at Flossie’s corker holder and said, “Flossie, is that the right size for you? Are you sure it fits? Isn’t it a bit on the, er, large side?”

Flossie had her Deep South accent on again and said, “Oh, it fits all right, Talllluuuuulah Casey. It fits REAL fine. Real snug! I’ll show you.” And she went off and swished the curtain round her bed.