Shit. I’ve had those two so busy between helping me out and taking care of their responsibilities upstate, they probably haven’t had a minute to spare.

“There’s been a few shakeups in the club. I’m actually running downstate while Sway’s been in the hospital.”

“Downstate?” He gives me a blank look. Downstate didn’t exist when Grinder went inside. “Right. Right.” He touches his head and grins. “Surprised Sway’s still alive. Figured Tawny would’ve shot him by now.”

I almost choke. “Yeah, we all thought so.”

“You settle down?”

“Funny you ask. Yeah.” I clear my throat and pull out a small picture the guards let me take in. All my other personal shit had to be left in a locker out in the waiting area. “Have a son too.”

“Shit.” Grinder’s eyes shine as he takes the photo. “That’s great, Z. Damn, looks just like ya.”

“Right? He’s a fun little dude. I can’t wait for you to meet him.”

He nods and hands the photo back slowly. “No matter what, you do whatever you have to do to protect ‘em, Z.”

The emotion in his voice stops me cold.

While I thought the news might cheer him up, give him stuff to look forward to, now I’m questioning my judgment. Grinder always wanted a family. Hell, he was a surrogate dad to most of us in the early days. Then he got tossed in prison, his wife left him, and all his plans for his life went up in smoke. Bragging about how well everyone’s doing seems fucking cruel now.

“It’s good to have something to look forward to, Z.” As if he knew where my mind went, he gives me a shadow of the shrewd biker smile I remember.

“You got plenty to look forward to, brother.” We talk a little longer until the guards tell us time’s up.

A heaviness I didn’t expect follows me out to the parking lot. Never felt this way after visiting a brother inside. Maybe it’s the weight of running my own club. Of wanting to do whatever it takes to keep my brothers out of prison. Or the ache of leaving a brother behind. A brother who’s already lost so much.

All the connections we’ve developed over the years have never been able to help Grinder.

Still bothered, I head North.

Not that Crystal Ball will help, but I stop there first.

The only person that could shake off my black mood today stands against the back wall, arms crossed over his chest, watching the room like he’s dying for one of the customers to step out of line so he can kick someone’s ass.

“What the fuck you doing here, brother?” I shout, slapping Rock’s shoulder.