They fell silent and Andrea wrestled with herself internally as she tried to decide if Tony had a point or not. Yes, it was true that once again, Heather had only ducked out for a short time this afternoon . . . but why did she keep doing it? Why did she keep leaving her daughter unattended?

Or did Andrea feel so strongly about it because of the way her own mother had treated her? Because there had been no one around to step in and check on her when she was left alone for hours at a time?

Once again, the thought crossed her mind. What kind of a mother would I be?

But it was a moot point. She and Tony had made the decision. The ‘what do we both want’ conversation had come up after only a few dates, but that was to be expected when you met someone in your mid to late thirties — you needed to find out fast if you were on the same page. Tony had been easygoing to begin with. He probably didn’t want to have kids, but he could be swayed if she was really keen. She’d been leaning towards a no, but had agreed that she was pretty much the same — she could potentially be swayed if he was desperate for children.

And so their relationship had progressed. They’d moved in together. Tony had proposed after only six months and initially, when she’d seen the sparkle of the diamond as he knelt down in front of her, her instincts had said, no, it’s too soon! But then he’d made his speech. I’m going to take care of you. I’m going to treat you the way you’ve always deserved to be treated. No one else could ever love you as much as I love you.

The strong, independent woman inside of her was ashamed to admit those words spoke to her. No, she didn’t need a man to take care of her — but at the same time, after having had one too many men treat her so badly, she craved what he was offering. So, she’d ignored the doubts and said yes. Besides, relationships rarely recovered from a rejected proposal and she wasn’t ready to let him go. What if she never found someone who cared for her so deeply again?

About a year into the marriage, she’d realised that their ‘probably not but some day maybe’ stance on kids had shifted to ‘definitely not’ without them ever having really talked about it again. It was clear in the way he answered questions from well-meaning friends or relatives. No, we’ve decided not to have children. We just feel it’s the right choice for us. And Andrea would nod in agreement even as a voice inside wondered, but when did we decide for sure?