It was as they were stumbling out onto the footpath that Steph mentioned the new girlfriend.

‘We have to do this again,’ Charlotte had been saying, or slurring, really. ‘This was fun. We have to have all the fun before me and Steph are home being new mummies.’

‘Yes!’ Steph shouted a little too loudly. ‘And Darren can bring his new lady friend!’

Charlotte had spun around on the spot and almost lost her balance. ‘New lady friend? What new lady friend?’

Thankfully a cab had pulled up right at that moment and Darren had bundled the two of them into the back seat, promising to tell them all about his ‘new lady friend’ soon.

Now, as he lay very still, breathing deep and trying his best not to throw up, he pictured Charlotte’s face as she’d looked back through the window while the cab pulled away. Was it just his imagination, or was it possible that she was jealous of him seeing someone new?

Jesus, he had to let that shit go.

He had to accept the facts.

He had to throw up.

He lurched his body upright and then clambered off the bed and stumbled to the bathroom, just making it to the toilet in time. When he’d finished purging his stomach of the copious amount of alcohol he’d drunk, he lay down on the cool tiles and made himself a promise.

You’re going to get the fuck over Charlotte. You’re going to find this imaginary girlfriend and make her real. And you’re going to think properly about this promise you’ve made. Because if you can’t follow through, you’re going to have to man up and tell her.

CHRISTMAS EVE

The second driver slowed for a look, but he was in the far right lane and even after easing his foot off the accelerator, he was still going too fast to switch lanes and pull off onto the hard shoulder in time. Besides, was one of the cars a witness who’d already stopped to help? It didn’t look crumpled like the others. Although . . . was there smoke coming from its bonnet? Too late, he was past.

But he did at least hit the call button on the centre console.

‘Who do you want to call?’ Siri asked in her weirdly stilted voice, the intonation always slightly off.

‘Triple zero.’

‘Calling Tristan mobile.’

‘No. Stop. Hey Siri. HEY! SIRI! STOP!’

Tristan’s voice filled his car. ‘G’day mate, haven’t heard from you in yonks.’

‘Yeah, sorry, bud. Siri fucked up and called you by mistake. I was trying to call for an ambo. Just passed an accident on the freeway.’ ‘Far out. You need to go?’

‘Nah, look, it’s not worth it now. There’s probably already a whole heap of people calling in about it and I think someone had already stopped. How are you anyway?’