“You can’t move into a house without permission.”

“But that’s what we’ve done. We’ve made no secret of the fact that we’re living here. This is simply the first time you thought to question us.”

“This isn’t an argument between us, Edna. We’ll call the Adelsons and tell them what you’ve admitted. They can fly out and deal with it in the next couple of days.”

A smile touched her lips and dimples appeared. “You are setting yourselves up for a lawsuit for wrongful eviction. If the Adelsons take us to court and lose, they will have to pay court costs and our attorney’s fees, which I can assure you will be substantial. This will be a long-drawn-out procedure—very lengthy—with countless delays—and it won’t come cheap. If you think it’s easy to get tenants out, you’re mistaken.”

“You’re not tenants. You’re squatting,” I said.

“Also known as ‘adverse possession,’” she said. “You’ll find our rights in the matter aren’t so easily abridged. Beyond that, we don’t appreciate the name-calling. During the time we’ve lived here, we’ve improved the property, which was sadly neglected. There were so many cockroaches in the kitchen, we could have called the health department to complain. Rats, too, which are known carriers of the hantavirus. We paid for pest control and eradicated the vermin. You’ve seen us paint and make repairs. Whether you like it or not isn’t relevant. You can’t throw us out in the street. We’re elderly and we won’t be harassed and persecuted.”

“Who’s harassing you?!”

“I believe raising your voice in a threatening manner with the intent to intimidate old people would be considered a form of harassment.”

“How about the fact that you’re trespassing?” I said. “We should just call the police and let them deal with you.”

Edna made her little dimples appear. “This is a civil matter. I can assure you the police won’t want to step into the situation, especially when we can show a rental agreement in support of our occupancy.”

I said, “I know a couple of detectives with the STPD, and believe me, they won’t hesitate to ‘step in’ and run a computer check. You better hope you don’t have so much as an unpaid parking ticket.”

Henry gestured impatiently. “This is getting us nowhere. We’ll let the Adelsons know we’ve had this conversation. May I keep this?”

“That’s my only copy and I’ll thank you to return it,” she said, and held out her hand.

Henry gave her the rental agreement. Edna walked us to the door and stood there stubbornly, watching our departure with a satisfied expression. We descended the porch stairs and walked the twenty-five yards to Henry’s house.

I said, “Pardon my language, Henry, but what the fuck was that?”

• • •

In the morning, I was still stewing about the tactics Joseph and Edna had employed with regard to the property next door. How could they simply move into a house and live there without paying rent? It seemed outrageous to me, but she’d defended their position with such confidence, it had to be a plan they’d executed before. The Adelsons would be forced to hire an attorney to assert their rights to a house they already owned.