I shrugged. “We’re killing two birds with one stone. Seizing the day when it feels right.”

14. Harper

14

About fifteen minutes into our walk down the Brooklyn Bridge toward the Manhattan side, August and I stopped to admire the view. We were right near the pylons and it was hard to see much with all the cables and nets surrounding both sides of the pedestrian walkway, but I managed to get some amazing shots with my camera phone.

“I can’t believe how surreal this is,” I said as August tugged me out of the way of a biker.

“All this time, I’ve been admiring the view of the bridge from the city streets, never realizing that it’s so much more magnificent looking out of it.” I wasn’t sure if I was making any sense, but then August basically summed it up for me in his own words.

“The city is much more attractive from afar, I agree,” he chuckled.

I tucked my arm under his as the cool wind blew against us. He squeezed it and we continued to stroll down the walkway.

We talked more about my list and August joked about my spending any more time with him. “At this rate, you’ll be done with your list by next week, then what will you do?”

I laughed it off like the joke that it was, but as I considered it, I wondered if I would need to carry it around anymore. If I’d keep doing things on the list just to keep her alive. My chest ached at the idea of letting go.

“What’s wrong?” August picked up on my mood shift and I wondered what gave it away.

“Nothing, why?”

“You were leaning against my shoulder and then you disappeared somewhere.”

“Well, I thought better of it. Wouldn’t want to get too clingy.”

He opened his mouth to respond but I cut him off. “I promise the random occurrences of showing up at your apartment will stop.”

“Don’t make promises I don’t want you to keep.” His words came fast, I almost missed what he said until he winked.

“Cute.”

“I try.”

His warm hand held mine all the way across the bridge and I cringed at the butterflies in my stomach.

It’s just the cold.

It was my body working to stay warm, that was all. I didn’t do well in the cold. Warmer climate was definitely in my future.

“Hey,” he yanked my arm to get my attention. “You’re not regretting coming by last night, are you?”

“No.” August. The word was so painfully unspoken because I wanted so much for this to be real with him. “I like being with you.”

I liked it so much. And it hurt not to tell him. It hurt that he wasn’t telling me.