I felt myself deflate. My head drooped until my chin rested against my chest. How could my friends think I would enjoy this? Even if this ordeal ended in a Swedish message with a happy ending, I’d never talk to them again. This was too far over the line. Hell, I was prepared to press charges. Put these assholes behind bars.

“You guys are so fucked,” I said. The tunnel’s acoustics accentuated the squeamish quality to my voice. It would have been interesting to record vocals in here. If, that is, we hadn’t just given our final performance. And assuming I ever got out.

Fuck that. Of course I would.

The tunnel had turned quiet, except for the occasional splashing of snakes. I couldn’t tell if my pursuers were approaching or staying put. Strange colors began to bleed into blind darkness. Burnt-orange window blinds. A flash of teal tracing the arc of a blade, or the wing of a bird. A swirling maroon that gave me momentary vertigo, making me lean forward for balance.

The darkness, the venom. Toxic hallucinations.

A deep, guttural vibration filled the tunnel. Someone humming, or Tire Iron’s dim-witted guffaw. It was impossible to locate its source as it built toward a pulsating OMMMM.

Then someone whispered right beside me. “Jesse. Mate, it’s me.” Pain streaked down my left arm, and I nearly prayed for a heart attack to put me out of my misery. I was too stunned to speak.

“Mate, don’t worry. It’s all just a gag.”

I heard the clink of metal, the scrape of flint. A small spark flashed and faded out. The flip-top lighter flashed again, this time producing flame.

It felt like I was being electrocuted. A mixture of fear and absolute relief. Like jumping to your death from a tall bridge, changing your mind midflight, and surviving the fall.

Caspian was standing next to me. The small, orange flame illuminated his face in a corona glow. His eyes were still half-lidded. His mouth was drooping in a drunken sneer. He hardly looked conscious, and I wondered how he had managed to navigate the channel in total darkness.

Who cared? Just moments ago I was ready to file charges, now I just wanted to give him a hug.

“Dude, Caspian!” I stepped toward him. His expression didn’t change.

Then my eyes adjusted to the flare of light and I saw the tendrils of sinew and spinal cord dangling from Caspian’s serrated neck. Another face came up next to his out of the gloom. Dark shadow in deep sockets. An old man’s weathered face. Orange light flickered off his thick lenses, obscuring his eyes.

Then the light went out. Something stepped in the water behind me.

“Told you we’d get you, boy,” Tire Iron said behind me. The last thing I heard was his inbred snicker.

I crumpled into a ball of light that wasn’t really there.