That was what persuaded her that she had found the perfect place. For years she had longed to cut herself off from the world by spending three weeks with no internet or phone, and here was the perfect opportunity to go completely offline.

‘Lise, can you imagine us going three weeks without the internet?’

‘I could do it.’

‘Well, I’m telling you now, I couldn’t. Because of my job, I can’t be offline.’

‘It would be so good for us. And we’d be away from all the noise and pollution, and especially the radiation …’

‘Lise, please don’t start all that again.’

For several years now, Lise had claimed to suffer from the harmful effects of electromagnetic radiation from phones and Wi-Fi. This was the reason she wanted to get away from it all. More than anything she wanted to lead the healthiest existence she could, waking up with the sun and then watching it set in the evening, living in the moment, aiming to do nothing more than walk, meditate and breathe air that was free of noise, waves and particles. Further research online had revealed there was an organic supermarket in the nearest village. The rest could be picked from their surroundings; she could already see herself foraging for berries and roots in the garden. This was what she had been dreaming of: three weeks in the depths of nature, in the wild, cut off from everything.

‘Look, Franck, you just don’t get that many holiday homes that don’t have Wi-Fi or a TV. It’s lucky that I happened to come across this one, and it’s free for all of August, too!’

‘That’s exactly what I’m worried about. Don’t you think it’s strange that no one has commented on the page or left a review? And what are we going to do with a hundred and twenty hectares of forest?’

‘Nothing at all. That’s the point.’

‘Lise, it’s not going to be very relaxing – no air conditioning, no TV … There probably isn’t even a kettle or a toaster.’

‘You can’t go a few weeks without a kettle and a toaster?’

‘No, I can’t. I’m a modern man; in the morning I need my kettle and my toaster. And there’s no pool! Where did you even find this site? Are you sure it’s not dodgy?’

‘Franck, you’re just scared of it just being the two of us for three weeks, without our friends and their kids and their motorboats, not even neighbours to distract us.’

‘If you’re looking for rest and relaxation, why don’t we go on a cruise, or trek through the desert? I get emails advertising those kinds of things all the time. Trust me, there’s plenty of other places in the world you could find your peace and quiet.’