I nodded and said, ‘You?’ Bette nodded, but at the same time her eyes filled with tears again. ‘I’ll miss you,’ she said.

‘I’ll miss you too, Grandma.’ And I meant it.

‘Thank you for coming,’ she said. ‘It’s made a big difference for me.’ She crossed the room and sat down next to me, and I put my arm around her and hugged her tight.

And then Hessel stepped into the kitchen.

‘You’re still here,’ he said to me.

Sitting up with my arm still around Bette I saw now that Hessel looked terrible. As he stepped over the little mound of my belongings that Mum had left by the door I saw that he was ashen-faced and his eyes were red, and I noticed what I hadn’t seen before, that he had straw stuck to his clothes with blood.

I had forgotten about the horse. Oh that poor, poor horse. I thought about what Hessel must have seen. What must have happened to make that much blood? That poor horse.

‘I’m just getting the last of my things together,’ I said.

And then Hessel said, ‘What’s going on? There’s a car –’ just as Mum walked back into the kitchen and stopped still at the sight of him.

Hessel looked at her. He said nothing. And then he shook his head. He turned away from her and turned the heat off under the rattling kettle.

Mum didn’t move from where she stood. But she spoke, low and dangerous. ‘Did you fucking touch her?’ she said. ‘Did you lay a fucking hand on my daughter?’

Hessel ignored her. He didn’t turn. He poured the water into the teapot until steam clouded the window above him. I stood. ‘Mum, it’s okay.’

‘And what about him?’ Mum said. ‘Where is he?’

The room had grown so dark so quickly. The sky outside was blotted with clouds and behind them the light was fading fast. And then Mum stepped forward into the room. She stepped right up to Hessel, right up to him, like a cock in a fight. ‘Where is he?’ she said. ‘Where is he?’

Hessel picked up a teaspoon and stirred the water in the teapot. He tapped the teaspoon on the edge of the pot.

‘I’ve never said, never said.’ Mum’s voice was high and thin. ‘Why couldn’t you have just left it alone?’

‘You left us,’ Hessel said quietly, placing the teaspoon next to the pot. ‘This is not good family.’

Mum’s eyes were wide. I was transfixed. She was trembling, I could see it now. She was so afraid, that’s what it was. Cold, hard fear. ‘I’m reporting you,’ she said, a tremor in her voice. ‘I’m telling what really happened. What you really did.’

Hessel’s face darkened. Mum turned away from him and walked steadily towards the door. ‘Come on, Anna. You have to come away now.’ I started out from behind the table. Mum leaned down, her fingers curling around a handful of my clothes on the floor. ‘They wouldn’t believe Leonie,’ she was saying. ‘But they’ll believe me –’