I set a thank-you note on the nightstand, like I always did at the end of every retreat, and shut the door behind me. There was no key, since they didn’t believe in locks. I had a hard time getting used to unlocked doors. That one had been harder than the brazen nakedness around the fire at night. I gulped in the trees and beautiful skies one more time before heading down the main road to meet the others going back on the buses with me.

THIRTEEN

ABBI

NOW

My legs shook underneath our dining room table. They’d been that way since Camille had called everyone downstairs for a meeting, except she hadn’t called it a meeting. She had called it a debrief and had said we’d be ending most days with them for a while. Meredith and Dad sat on each side of me, and normally it would’ve comforted me, but it made me feel wedged in. Maybe it was the investigators lining the walls behind us. They were like having ghosts in our house. They moved around without saying anything, drifting in and out of rooms while they did their jobs. One of their jobs was keeping the media out of our yard and respecting the perimeter they’d set up around our house. That guy was busier than all of them, since people were constantly trying to break the boundary or get to our door by pretending to be someone else. I’d be glad when everyone left us alone.

Camille stood at the head of the table, impatiently tapping her fingers on the wood as she waited for Dean and one of the other FBI specialists to settle into the seats on the other side of us. She’d dismissed Mom upstairs to rest with Shiloh before dinner, and Mom’s face had melted in relief. “We’ve had our first break in the case today,” she said once they finally sat down.

I reached for Dad’s hand, clinging to it. His palms were sweaty.

“Are you familiar with an organization called Love International?” she asked.

I whipped around to see Dad’s reaction. His first response would be my clue to how he felt, since he’d gotten so good at wearing a neutral face for me over the years.

“Yes, she wrote an amazing piece on them the year she went missing, and she was a member of their organization. Do they have something to do with this?” Confusion twisted his expression.

Camille nodded. “It appears that she’s been with them since she went missing.”

Nothing could erase the shock plastered on his face. “What? That’s impossible.” He rapidly shook his head back and forth. “How do you know? Did she tell you that?”

“She did.” Camille’s expression hadn’t changed.

Over the years, I’d learned every person of interest on her case, and Love International had never made it on the list. Dad had been meticulous in his search. How had he missed them?

“But, but I . . . it just doesn’t . . .” Dad dropped my hand and rubbed his forehead like the information had given him a headache. “They helped us look for her. They formed crews at base camp and organized searches. They plastered shopping malls and gas stations with flyers. I think they even held a candlelight vigil for her at their campus.”