On the third night, he came back in from his office to find Shawn sitting at the kitchen table, eating a sandwich. The few times that Walter had seen the boy, he had never not been eating. Walter was sure that if he stayed much longer, he would surely bankrupt them on groceries alone.

“Do you want a sandwich?” Shawn asked. “I have three of them here.”

Walter closed the door behind him with a sigh. “Did you just offer me some of my own food?”

“Hey, man, sorry. I just thought maybe you were hungry.”

Walter was hungry. But he certainly was not going to eat one of Shawn’s sandwiches. He knew he was being petty; he didn’t care. Kate had no right to invite someone to live with them – to stay in their house, for chrissake! – without even consulting him. But when he opened the breadbox, he saw that Shawn had used up all the bread.

“Fine,” said Walter. “I’ll take one.”

Shawn held the plate out to him, and he took the top sandwich. Bologna and mustard. His favourite. The kid had piled four pieces of bologna on each sandwich and squished the bread down, turning it into a solid block. But it tasted good, Walter would give him that. He took a small bite, eyeing Shawn.

“You don’t trust me, do you?” Shawn said, hunching over his second sandwich.

“No,” said Walter.

Shawn smiled at him and licked a dribble of mustard off the side of his hand. “That’s good,” he said. “You shouldn’t.”

Walter never forgot those words, and for the next several months, he waited for the other shoe to drop. But Shawn never did a single thing to indicate he was anything but a good, decent kid, which on many levels was more unnerving. And he slid so easily into the family, something else that bothered Walter immensely. It was as though he knew exactly where Walter was failing and filled in the holes. He took Finn to the movies, he let Nicki paint his nails, he stepped in when the two of them were fighting and made everyone laugh with a dumb joke. And when Kate was diagnosed with breast cancer, Shawn took her to all her radiation appointments and helped her recover from her surgery. Finn had an ally, Nicki had a sounding board, and Kate had a rock. Shawn was better at being a Parker than Walter was. Now when Walter came home, he was the stranger in the house.

Walter had chosen a side, and it turned out to be the wrong one. No matter what he did to try to make up for it, that one fact would always be true.

—