Lauren is everything I wish I could have but can’t. And I’m not a man who is used to not getting what he wants. I work hard for what I get. Every muscle on my body. Everything I’ve ever accomplished. It’s been hard work and dedication from start to finish. But this? Being with a girl who isn’t just a one-nighter? It’s not possible for me, and the truth is infuriating.

“Slade, calm down. I’m not asking you for anything. You have your own life, all right? I’m just here temporarily. After this trip, we never have to see each other again. You don’t have to be an asshole to me. We can be civil.” Her voice is a whisper, as though she’s begging me to be kinder.

Why does she have to be so nice? So sweet?

Her words are hard, but her heart still opens for me.

“I’ll stop acting like an asshole.”

She exhales.

Before I can think it through, I tell her, “Let’s sit together and watch the sunset. It’s going down soon.”

“You want to sit. With me?” She purses her lips. “The girl you have nothing in common with?”

“Come on. You know that shit wasn’t true.”

She takes a hard swallow. “But you said it.”

“Come on.” A cushioned bench lines the perimeter. “No one here but us.” I gesture to the couch.

She rigidly sits down, raising her legs in front of her before invitingly opening them. She taps the space between her knees. The sun lowers, casting an orange glow over the boat.

Hesitantly, I sit between her legs. I twist my torso to face her. “You’re not going to strangle me, right?”

“I considered it.” She raises her brows at me. “But, no, I won’t.”

She pulls me back by the shoulders, so I’m resting my head in the juncture between her thighs. Part of me wants to jump upward, but her fingers move into my hair, and it feels so damn good.

“You aren’t a materialistic bitch either,” I add. “I know you’re not.”

“Thanks.” Her voice drips with sarcasm. “I know who I am. Now, straighten your head, so I can massage your face. Lord knows you need something to calm your domineering ass down.”

She drops her thumbs on the bridge of my nose, pushing down and out over my cheekbones. I let out a sigh.

“Am I allowed to ask you what it’s like in Afghanistan, or are you going to chew my head off?”

I tilt my head up to see her. “Lots of good people. Some bad.”

“On the way to Utah, I ordered a book on my Kindle about Adam Brown. The Navy SEAL. I’ve been reading it.”

I melt from her hands. “Did you now? Adam was a good man.” I close my eyes and try not to smile at the fact that she’s trying to learn more about me. Shaking off my attempt to keep her away, I find myself in a warmth I can’t fight. I don’t deserve it, but fuck if it’s not the best feeling I’ve ever had.