I struggle to get the words out. ‘Katie was my best friend at the care home. We lived at the same place for years; we were like sisters and did everything together.’ I stare at the floor behind him, dreading what I might see. The footprints are still there, but no more have appeared. It’s as if whatever’s there has stopped in its tracks, holding still, listening.

Tom’s eyes search mine. ‘Go on. You did everything together and …?’

The shadow on the chair next to him has gone. I lean across the table and look to make sure, but all I see is a towel on the seat, the one with the black stain from last night.

Tom follows my gaze and looks confused. ‘Ivy?’

I don’t want to tell him, but then I remember how the darkness receded from my bed after I admitted how I was feeling. Maybe whatever was there has gone because I started to tell him what happened. I bite my lip and decide to keep talking.

‘It was a long time ago. We were only fourteen. Katie started seeing this boy, and he was always getting her to sneak out of the home to meet him.’ I take a deep breath. ‘We used to spend all our time together and then suddenly I hardly ever saw her. I tried not to let it show, but she knew I was upset. One night she wouldn’t leave it alone. She kept asking me what was wrong and in the end I told her.’

Tom frowns. ‘You told her how you were feeling?’

‘I tried to explain that I missed her, but she accused me of being jealous because she had someone and I didn’t. I told her I wouldn’t want someone like him, and that she’d get into trouble if anyone found out about them. We argued and I gave her a choice. Either stop seeing him or we couldn’t be friends. I didn’t mean it; she was all I had. I loved her more than anyone or anything …’

Tom touches my hand. ‘What happened?’

‘She climbed out the window and that was the last time I saw her. She didn’t come home the next day, or the next. The care home staff went to the police, but they couldn’t find her. I spoke to her boyfriend but he hadn’t seen her. I looked everywhere I could think of; I went into town and talked to people living on the streets. It was like she’d vanished. I still don’t know what became of her. I don’t even know if she’s alive or not.’

Tom’s eyes fill with sympathy. ‘We’ve all done things we regret. We’ve all said things and not meant them. You were young; you couldn’t have known what would happen.’