‘They banged in nails,’ and he pointed his finger into the middle of his palm. ‘My mum has to take off the bandages and look after him. I’ve seen it. A man comes round and gives him injections.’

I looked at the fiver in my hand. ‘What shall I do with this?’ I said.

‘Can you give it back?’

I shook my head. He nodded.

‘What would you do with a hundred pounds?’ I asked.

‘Run,’ he said, ‘because they’ll come after it.’

We both smiled. I tucked the note back in my pants.

‘Maybe you can leave it somewhere they can find it?’ he said.

We froze because something moved. It was down in the hole. It wasn’t a cat. It was inside, tugging at the mattress. My stomach went cold and suddenly we were scampering across the ledge to the opening and got out.

The lamp posts had come on. We looked at each other to get steady. Brian had a cut on his arm and licked it with some spit. It was there, but he could close it up. We both nodded not to say anything and turned for him to cross the road and me to run home.

Grey Blue Green

‘I found this, Mum.’

‘Don’t tell anyone,’ she said, tucking the fiver away in her purse. ‘They don’t need to know.’

‘Why not?’

‘That’s grown-up business,’ she said, putting her finger to her lips to say keep out of it. ‘And where have you been?’

I thought I was going to say something to make her not listen and forget, but what came out was, ‘I was hiding in the bomb site with Brian.’

‘Why were you doing that?’

‘Because you don’t want us to be together and his mum can’t take care of me,’ I said. ‘She’s looking after his uncle, he’s got holes in his hands.’

She looked at me close up. I couldn’t remember which one was her glass eye, the one that was more grey, or the one that was grey-green and blue, because they were both glassy and moved over my face in the same way.

‘And how’s Brian?’ she said.

‘Why don’t you like him?’

‘You like him, that’s good enough for me.’

‘He told me to give it back.’

She gave me a look like lots of questions at once. ‘Go and be with him, but don’t go to his house.’

‘Why not?’

‘They don’t want you there,’ she said. ‘They’ve got things to hide.’

‘His mummy likes me.’

‘Yes, I know. They love you.’

My chest swelled up but I felt out of breath and confused. They didn’t want me and they loved me. I shook my question back at her in my face – what should I do?

‘Wait until his father goes away,’ she said. ‘And don’t tell yours.’

‘What’s that fuckin’ black cunt – ?’